The bodyguard
by marielitaaa
Summary: Love can hinder the job of a bodyguard. Kiku has a strong conviction, but his self-restraint is tested.  AU.
1. prologue

The great Kirkland family is prestigious for being wealthy, admired, and even for having some noble blood. Naturally, such powerful families spawn greed, jealousy, and enemies. In such a case, the family members require constant protection from threatening unawares. As the Kirkland family gained more fame, they also suffered a great loss. The "threatening unawares" have started to become more apparent.

* * *

><p>Wang Yao was the head member of the most elite bodyguard in his country. The Wang clan have being protecting the imperial family for many generations, and to this day, continue doing so. However, the clan is not imperial exclusive for their dedication to serving lives have reached across the seas. Their devotion and perseverance could not be endeavored by any other bodyguard agency, or so they said. However, the personal preference of the emperor for the Wang clan was enough reputation to the Kirkland family.<p>

And so the Wang bodyguard service was requested.

"You have my deepest condolences Mr. Kirkland. I am sure the loss of the Lady could never be replaced, but be confident that no life will be stolen under our services, aru," the Chinese man affirmed. "Yes of course. However, as much as I do have great confidence of your services just by the mere weight of your family's reputation, you do express a powerful exertion. Are you that assured of your abilities?" the head Kirkland replied.

The Asian gave the gentleman an almost smug smile. "It is because we don't plan failure, failure is simply not an option. An idea in the mind is so powerful that it can threaten to manifest itself. That is why we don't allow the smallest hint of failure, we are that determined to persevere. That's why Mr. Kirkland, you are safe under our protection, aru".

"I'm pretty sure the last agency said that too, and well…Even more, from what my sources say, the poison was meant for me. Anyways, I don't care for pretty words, all I hope that your family's reputation will do the job". The British man stood up from his seat and proceeded to the double windows. It was raining outside and the gray atmosphere clouded all scenery. The gentleman observed in silence the nothingness and the Asian waited patiently, when he finally said, "I'm especially concerned about my heir".

As he did not resume, Yao decided it was his turn to speak. "Is there any preference you would have us do to assure your son's well-being? I discussed the protocols of our bodyguard services, but something has been lingering in your mind sir, aru".

"My son, he is not quite the social type you see, and I'm afraid his mother's death could have affected him greatly. I know you only offer protection services, but I'm afraid safeguarding him against the world will only set him apart from reality".

The British man removed himself from the window and faced the Asian, wanting to be fully understood. "I don't want him to become-"

"Mr. Kirkland, I comprehend you are troubled as a father for your son's growth. A childhood is what defines a man's path, and you are worried that a bodyguard's safeguarding procedures will isolate him from socializing, because well, being protected means being taken away from threats, and pretty much of the world, aru". The head Kirkland smiled, "so I trust you understand where I'm leading to?"

"You want someone his age to babysit him, if I am correct, aru", Yao responded.

"So can you?"

"I think we might have the right person, aru".

* * *

><p>"I absolutely don't need a brat looking after me! I know what game you are playing sir, he won't be my friend, and please, I won't consider him as a brother either. I have enough of them!" the young Kirkland protested dramatically. "If I am to be protected, why can it not be a full-fledged bodyguard with the skills? I am sure to be killed; he is barely older than me!"<p>

The older Kirkland sighed, displeased in his son's manners, "he is full-fledged, and for his age, that would be called a prodigy, Arthur".

The young British boy opened his eyes, contemplating the Asian boy in front of him for the first time. He had a monotonous expression; apparently his insults did not affect him a bit. There seemed not to be anything special about the Asian: he had brown eyes and hair, he even was the same height as himself, in spite of being couple years older than he. Arthur breathed out laboriously, maintained his arms crossed to express his opposing position, and continued, "I'm not an idiot, if he is as good as any full-fledged bodyguard, why get one my age? I'm just fine by myself".

The elder Kirkland coughed to show his ever growing discontentment, "Mr. Wang, please ignore my son's rudeness. But I assure you he won't give young Kiku any problems, am I correct?"

The Chinese merely smiled; he and Kiku were used to noble arrogance, and the young Master was no exception. Of course he did not utter his thought out loud.

"No I won't Father," Arthur muttered under his breath. "And I won't give you any either Master," Kiku said with a small bow. Arthur didn't know where to glance, and somewhat nervously nodded in response. Even though all he conveyed was offense, and rightfully felt doing so since his father was revealing that he thought of him as a loner, he was inwardly grateful for that concern. Perhaps they were right; perhaps he did need a youth to improve his social skills.

But of course, as young as he may be, Arthur was full of pride and will not easily concede that he needed a friend, much less from a bodyguard. He eyed Kiku once again and smirked, "Well! Your job starts now, so follow me, we will have tea very soon and I want you to help me set up the water". He really would have him do everything to test how much of loyal service the young Asian would be. Oh how much fun it would be to test his new lab rat.

As Arthur rushed away to his room with the young bodyguard quietly following suit, the elder Kirkland could not help to sigh. "Do not worry Mr. Kirkland, I think the two will balance just well, aru," the Chinese man assured. "I honestly hope so; my son can be very difficult".

"I think the patience of Kiku is just what he may need, aru". The gentlemen nodded, still processing his thoughts and the words of the Asian, as both proceeded to his office to begin business.

Yes, Arthur needed a being in his life to balance that exploding energy within him, energy that produced continuous bickering that only the ever tolerant Kiku could withstand. But how could a balance work if the latter was not affected? What Wang Yao did not predict was that the balance of personas would in return, affect the young bodyguard as well.


	2. Chapter 1

They were an odd couple to watch at first sight. A Japanese youth with a British boy. Heads will turn to watch the duo, the blond always finding something to argue about while the other responded awkwardly. Why would such individuals join in a friendship? They seemed out of the ordinary; however, the truth was that the Japanese youth was the bodyguard to the British boy.

That occurrence annoyed the blond to no end. It was such an irony that the only being that would accompany him was someone that was _paid _to do so. To Arthur, it was just another interest –motivated somebody, comparably to his father's associates. That was one of the reasons he could never befriend anyone. They could never like him for who he was.

It was true that the Japanese didn't look for friendship, but was rather, quite passionate about his job. That was all he knew and raised to do. And so when his ward asked him if he knew of any fairy tale stories, he simply didn't know what to respond.

"Forget it, just as expected, I don't even know why I bother commencing a conversation with your likes," Arthur exclaimed.

Currently they were on his father's library, a room not only piled with books, but luxurious lavishes. As a note, the Kirkland family is known to spend their money in abundance for their peers to admire. In this way they earned their wealthy reputation, but of course their jealous enemies too. The library was no exception, a fact that Kiku could relate to his Emperor's ways.

All nobles were the same, showy. However, his current thoughts focused on the young British. "Forgive me if I present…ignorance Master," he gently responded. "What does ignorance have to do with this? Surely everyone knows some fairy tale, or do you think you are _too_ old for them already?" Arthur huffed.

These sorts of inquiries have been making Kiku feel uneasy. After all, he didn't desire to upset his ward; a bodyguard's goal was not just to secure his master's life, but being of a pleasant presence as well. The best bodyguards must also be likeable; it will be an annoyance to be with someone you are sharing your personal life the whole day and also having to put up with their likes.

Kiku then inclined his neck and bowed his head to the boy, "please forgive me for insulting, but I don't know what a 'fairy tale' is".

This only earned a drop of the jaw from Arthur. Kiku mistook the blonde's surprise by utter exasperation and his blood ran cold. _I offended the Master, what to do, what to do, _Kiku went on in his mind. "Master I…"

"Don't tell me you've never-"

The door swung open and in entered a maid. "Master Arthur, I was informed to tell you dinner is ready." She gave a quick reverence and made her way out as quickly as she had come in. They stared at each other awkwardly for what seemed an eternity, both still confounded. The blonde broke the silence, "I'll see you later at night then".

* * *

><p>As Arthur made his way up the main stairs, to the left wing to go to his bedroom, thoughts poured in his head, one followed another without rest. <em>Is it because of his culture? Did anyone even read bedtime stories to him? Could it be because he did not have a mother? Surely any mum tells fairy tales to her children.<em>

Past the hall covered with art galleries, past the corner with the iron-barred window, and past the roses-decorated furniture, the boy made his way to his room. The room was already lit and the bed was being undone by the Japanese bodyguard. Arthur let go of his thoughts and embraced the annoyance he felt for the Asian. "You know, you don't have to do that, that's why I have servants".

He walked past the bodyguard, who had looked away in response, blushing slightly, and entered the bathroom.

"Don't tell me you prepared the bathtub as well," he said with a hint of irritation. Kiku had been doing other servant work as well, such as preparing his lunch and such, but he seemed to be over doing it this time. _Does he expect a raise or something? _he thought as he got in the hot water. Once he showered and exited the bathroom, the Japanese was nowhere to be found, but instead found his nightclothes folded in his bed. _He is over doing it…_

As he changed and let himself drop on his cushioned bed, Kiku suddenly appeared sitting on the chair next to the bed.

"Where did you-"

"Master forgive me from earlier, but I did not seek to offend". Arthur rubbed his temple and sighed, "Oh so that's why…I'll tell you for sure tomorrow alright?"

Arthur lied on his side, as the bodyguard covered him with the bed sheets. He always wanted to ask him if he stayed up all night just guarding him, but sleep would win and forget to do so.

* * *

><p>The next day was different than the others. In the morning, Arthur would wake up for school and the Japanese left for his training sessions. The blond was accompanied by his original bodyguard who was in charge of driving him to school and then bring him back home. Arthur would then meet with Kiku and either headed to the library, the common room or the garden. Dinner would then follow and the same nightly routines ended the day.<p>

This particular day was different because it was the head Kirkland who accompanied Arthur as they entered the house. "Kiku, make sure he doesn't leave his room," Arthur's father told the young bodyguard, who had already being waiting for their arrival. "I'll think of a better punishment later". The Japanese then exerted his attention to the blond and motioned him to follow him. As soon as the head Kirkland departed, they made their way to the left wing.

"What, aren't you going to ask what happened?" Arthur asked bitterly. Kiku continued to lead and did not look back to answer. However, he had being fully aware of the brand new bruises covering Arthur's arms and face. After a long pause and choosing his response wisely, the Japanese answered, "It is simply not my position to probe, Master".

"Of course you would say that," Arthur sniffed.

Kiku opened the door for Arthur and followed him inside. "Master, please forgive me, but how can I say this… "

"That it's none of your business?" the blond snapped. The bodyguard fell silent and looked away. "It was foolish to think that you could care," he said and dropped to his bed.

Kiku felt uneasy and somewhat bewildered. The British boy let his thoughts be known so easily, he would have never dared to do so with Wang Yao. _If I ever confessed my feelings to Yao-san, he certainly would…_He would have seen it as weakness.

And in entered the timid maid.

"The Master's father informed me that he must not go outside for the whole week and study extra hours for his materials".

Arthur snorted, "why can't he tell me that himself?"

The maid only bowed as a response and made her way out. "He can't enforce that if he is not personally here to tell me so right?" Arthur told the bodyguard. "Young Master, maybe it is best to-"

"Oh now you want to probe huh."

The Asian looked down, his face red. "Well whatever, I suppose I should…he did look pretty mad," Arthur said, more to himself than to the bodyguard. His father could come to check his orders would be followed after all. Fear as motivation, the British got up and took out his study book. All the while, Kiku felt he had to say _something; _he felt he had failed the young master more than enough.

It was just so odd to speak first, especially when Arthur had already busied himself with his reading. Hoping not to be rude, he finally found the audacity to speak up. "Master… what did happen?"

It barely came out as a whisper. "Huh, what was that?" Arthur asked, turning to face the Japanese with the flushed cheeks.

"Master, what happened to you?" he repeated. Arthur just gawked at him, making Kiku redden even more. "I, well…I got into a fight," Arthur responded, still shocked at the Japanese's new found concern.

"Oh…" _What comes next?_

Luckily, Arthur went on without having to be asked to continue. "The Spanish git _really _asked for it this time".

Arthur's body language said it all; he wasn't very fond of this Spanish person. But now there was nothing to stop him from his rant and went on nonstop, all the while the Japanese stood foolishly in the middle of the room. "-the instructor had to separate us, but I know Antonio had lost the battle…Hey don't just stand there, come sit with me". The British boy had now a wide smile in his face.

"Yes Master…"

The Japanese felt his legs take him to Arthur and his arms get a chair next to him. He was nervous for some reason. "And please drop the 'Master' or 'young Master'. Arthur is my name you know."

"Master, I could never".

Arthur frowned; the Japanese saw some sadness in it.

"I won't force you then…"

The bodyguard felt he was failing the British boy once again and had to conform. "Arthur-san."

The blond beamed, "That's better! But please no honorifics!"

"Now I can't do that Mas…Arthur-san".

"Fine," the blonde sighed. He then gave the bodyguard a mischievous smile. "I'm not really doing my homework," he said. Kiku glanced at the desk where a colorful book covered a much bigger one.

Kiku did not know how to respond, so Arthur continued, "I'm reading a fairy tale book! Remember I was going to tell you more about it? You really don't know what they are, don't you?" The bodyguard shook his head, no. "Are you even from this world?" Arthur exclaimed, as he shook Kiku's shoulders.

After Kiku felt silent out of shame, the British boy proudly decided it was his job to "enlighten" him. Kiku found the stories quite fascinating and entertaining at first, but decided they were a little too unreal. "Well, that's why they are _fairy tales!" _Arthur explained as Kiku had decided to let his opinion be known. They lost themselves in the spellbinding stories once more, when eventually they reached one of pixies.

"They are quite impish don't you think?" Kiku observed. "No, it's just that they portray them that way!" Arthur said a bit too offensive. Kiku simply did not know what to respond, the blond had apparently taken it too personal for a _fairy tale. _Arthur noticed Kiku's knitted eyebrows; he knew the Japanese now thought he had gone crazy.

He proceeded to look both ways, seeing if someone was overhearing. "No one is here but us, if you are concerned about your security Arthur-san," Kiku said, noticing his behavior. Arthur chuckled, "no it's not that…come closer". Kiku hesitated, but obeyed. Arthur cupped his hands to Kiku's ears and whispered, "I saw a fairy once…"

The bodyguard's eyes widen, he was in disbelief.

"I did too!" Arthur found himself raising his voice, "and we even talked!"

Before Kiku could respond, they heard the doorknob shake and the door open, not giving Arthur enough time to hide his fairy book. Both expected the head Kirkland, but instead three youths entered. "Oi, Artie, guess who decided to visit?" the tallest said.

Arthur clicked his tongue and responded, "Don't call me that. So when are you leaving?"

The trio laughed, but Kiku could tell not of amusement. "Do you know them?" the Japanese bodyguard asked Arthur carefully. "Yes, they are my older brothers, unfortunately". The trio finally took notice of Kiku and the tallest took lead again. "Who is this cute girl, hmm?" he said, while rubbing Kiku's hair.

Arthur shot up, "Leave him alone! And he is _not _a girl!"

Kiku felt too embarrassed to say anything, and plus it wasn't his place to say anything at all. Luckily, the tallest brother averted his attention once again. "You still reading baby's book, Artie? How old are you now, 9?"

"I'm ten!" Arthur yelled as he jumped to reach back for his beloved book, which had been snatched away. "Lemme see that Scott!" another brother said, wanting in the fun. Scott mindlessly threw the book at the next brother who then began flipping the pages. "You know I still kinda enjoy these stories". The last brother rolled his eyes, "what is to like about those damn stories?"

"They have brave knights."

"Whose sole motivation is to save useless princesses."

"Give it a break, it's just a fairy tale book," Scott intervened. As the trio argued, who have seemed to have forgotten why they had come to visit in the first place, Arthur could not do anything but clench his fists. Kiku had noticed the bullied position Arthur was now in, but he simply could not do anything about it, and became one with the background.

To Arthur's luck, the trios were making their way out. One of the brothers threw the book back to Arthur, all the while still feverishly continuing their argument. "Alright, so you are saying the stories were worthless because a knight could not stay with the princess?"

"Well _yes, _what's the point of saving the princess he has falling in love with, but cannot stay with her when he rightfully can?"

"He did save her after all."

"Both of you are missing the point!"

"What point? All I ever noticed that they preach about true love, but the knight never got the girl!"

"Well he did earn her heart."

"Haha, what is the point of that?"

"…Just think about it this way. If the knight marries the princess, who will be in charge of protecting her then?"

By then the trio had already left the room and were no longer audible.


	3. Chapter 2

It turned out that fairy tales bonded the unusual duo into what someone may call a "friendship". Also, the Japanese _had_ heard of similar stories before when Wang Yao used to be affectionate, the only difference was that they weren't necessarily called fairy tales. Kiku had truly enjoyed those stories that held strong morals, but had completely forgotten about them once his bodyguard training had commenced. However, as Arthur weaved the stories to life through the books, warm-childhood memories would fill his being completely.

In Arthur's case, he found it amusing that the fairy telling role had completely reversed. While he lay on his bed and the bodyguard sat on a chair beside him, he was the one telling the stories. Currently he told Kiku one called Cinderella. "I think I've heard of that one before, it just wasn't called like that," Kiku said. "Really, can you tell me?" Arthur begged.

"I'm sorry, I don't remember much, it was such a long time ago…"

Arthur showed disappointment. "But…I do recall there being a magical fish instead of a fairy godmother."

"A magic fish, now that is quite odd, "Arthur said, followed by a yawn. "You should go to sleep now," Kiku said, while getting up to tuck him in.

"Say Kiku…do you ever get any sleep?"

"Protecting you is always first priority," the bodyguard simply responded. "Oh c'mon, even assassins need to sleep too". Kiku only smiled and sat down back again when he finished making sure his ward was safe under the blankets. "You could sleep with me you know…because, friends do that, not that I want you to be close or anything…"

"Then you should get friends Arthur-san," Kiku replied, "I am your bodyguard, and I cannot place myself at your level. Furthermore, I cannot allow myself to rest while your life is in danger."

"I get it, I get it, if you really don't like me just say so," Arthur said, somewhat hurt. Arthur turned his back to Kiku, and breathed out hard. Kiku in return brushed his hair from his face; he really didn't want to be this aloof, but what he had said was true. Assassins plotted all the time.

The Asian wanted the blond to know that he cared, _maybe if I…_He reached out to Arthur's head, but froze. No, he couldn't dare.

* * *

><p>"Now look at that sight, Yao," the head Kirkland said. Both stared out the window where children could be seen at play. "I never imagined I would get to see this day."<p>

"What do you know? He actually did it, aru," Yao said, crossing his arms.

The children at play were Arthur and his new found friends from back at school. They had decided to play cricket, but they needed one more player. "Hey Kiku, be of some _actual _use and play with us!" Arthur beckoned. The other children cheered for him to join as well.

"Arthur-san, I am far too old for games," Kiku responded quietly. One of the girls began to laugh, "Where did you find him Arthur? He is a funny fellow".

"Don't make fun of him, Alice! But…he is rather odd isn't he?" Arthur said, and the rest laughed.

Kiku didn't like this kind of attention he was getting, and felt he had to defend himself, without being rude of course. "That's not the issue; I just have to be focused."

The snickering continued, but Arthur sighed, followed with a smile. "You take your job too seriously. We are not going to die. Anyways, cricket is a game for all ages, mister 'I'm too old for this'".

The snickering returned to laughter once more. That hit his last nerve, and the bodyguard discovered he had an ego deep inside of him that could not be made fun at. "Give me that club".

Arthur continued bringing new friends at his manor, but most were the original he had befriended first. One friendship that Kiku had specially noticed was the ever growing closeness with the Belgium girl, Alice, and he even noted it to Arthur. Arthur had blushed at this and responded, "It's not that I like her or anything! It just amuses me that Antonio disapproves of our friendship!" Alice and Antonio were cousins, and since the Spaniard and Arthur were rivals, her friendship with the British bothered him to no end.

For this reason, Arthur continued to bring bruises and cuts back home. At first, Arthur's father found it degrading for someone with his name to be acting like a plebeian, but eventually brushed it off as "boys being boys". After all, he didn't want his heir to become a weakling. However, the Japanese bodyguard disliked it greatly out of his caring nature and his intuition for Arthur's safety.

He feared that one day it could be taken too far. Although his fears did not necessarily come true, Arthur had being brought back home one day barely being able to walk out of his injuries. "Bloody hell what happened to him?" his father yelled. Wang Yao immediately rushed to get his medical kit; all the while the driver bodyguard carried him to the nearest couch.

"I-I found him this way Mr. Kirkland," the driver said. Kiku had barely made an entrance; he had seen Yao fly past him and immediately knew something had gone awry. His senses had been correct when he saw the British youth, but it was worse than he feared: he had never oozed blood, his uniform had never beem torn, and he had never been _unconscious._

"Damn it all, I never imagined they would take it this far," the head Kirkland said. "What happened?" Kiku asked. He hadn't asked that same question with genuine concern since the first time Arthur had come with bruises. The head Kirkland brushed off Kiku's question and replied to the driver instead, "Did they leave anything behind?"

"No sir, please forgive me for not being of any help…"

Yao then arrived with his medicines and motioned for Kiku to help him clean Arthur's wounds. As he did so, he had his ear attentive to what the head Kirkland had to say. "It's understandable; they know very well at what time you arrive. Well, they got my attention alright…"

The gentleman dismissed the driver and proceeded to stand in front of the Chinese man. "He will be alright?" he asked calmly. "We want to make sure he didn't receive a concussion, but he won't die, if that's your concern, aru".

"Good, then I shall get to them then…"the head Kirkland trailed off, as he walked away. Yao made sure he had completely gone, as he told Kiku, "A business man only cares for his finances, aru".

"Yao-san, what's going on?"

"Help me clean his wounds, and then we will take him to the infirmary". That meant he would not be the one to answer his probes.

* * *

><p>Arthur found himself in his own bed. He had no recollection how he had gotten there, and wished to get up; however, he was welcomed with pain all throughout his body as he did so. The pain brought back all the memories: he had always met on the back of school with Alice and the rest of his friends, but as soon as he had parted with them, he had being attacked from behind. He had received some self-defense training in case this scenario would ever occur, but this time he had been held down by two people, as one beat him down restlessly.<p>

"Tell Father hello, won't you?"

That was the last thing he had heard before falling unconscious. Now, his head and stomach throbbed, and his legs cried from pain. His whimpers were heard from the Japanese bodyguard and he immediately advanced towards the bed. "What hurts you?"

"Everything," he replied, and could not help to laugh about it. He had to stop at once as his stomach took revenge on it. Kiku could not help to smile either, and got up to bring a teacup. "Drink this, it will ease the pain." It was awfully bitter and he spit it out.

"Are you trying to kill me with this?"

"Quite the contrary Arthur-san. Now drink it or I will have to force it on you."

Arthur took in a huge breath and gulped it all at once. It caused a quiver from this body.

Once he had composed himself, he relaxed and dropped back to the pillow. "Kiku…did my father come to see me?"

"No."

The blond closed his eyes.

"If I may…may I know who did this to you?"

Arthur breathed out, opened his eyes, and sat up once more. "My brothers."

Kiku could not help to gasp. "That is dishonorable!"

"I can't blame them, with the kind of father we have, you know."

"Are you defending them even now?"

"What I'm trying to say is…The truth is they…"

Arthur could not find the right words. "Is it because you are the heir?" Kiku deduced.

"You can say it's something like that. Well, you see, my brothers…they were born out of wedlock," Arthur replied, he found himself quite uncomfortable confessing this.

"Oh…" Kiku left it at that.

"Yes…My father has been providing for them, but he's never there for them. He is hardly there for me as you've witnessed."

The Japanese wanted to somehow change the subject; he regretted greatly wanting to know something he shouldn't have.

"If I had been your bodyguard at school, this would have never happened," Kiku confirmed. Arthur smiled warmly, "I know that already."

It had turned out that the brothers weren't receiving financial aid as they used to and their father even threatened to completely abandon his sustainment to them. He believed they were old enough to "take care of themselves" as he put it. In return, they promised they would hear from them by attacking his "precious" son. The head Kirkland didn't take them seriously, and as a result, they proceeded to keep their promise.

Nevertheless, their father was a proud man and would not level himself with such immaturity. Instead, to both Kiku's and Arthur's surprise, he had assigned for the Japanese bodyguard to accompany him to school as well. Yao Wang protested since he had his own personal schedule with Kiku, but the Kirkland's word had been law. Arthur found it exciting that he could have more time with Kiku, but in turn, the Japanese had not looked happy at all.

At the limousine, where Kiku awaited for him, Arthur would enter full of energy and wanting to share his school day, but the Japanese didn't return the same enthusiasm. It didn't take the blond long to notice the dark bags that had formed in the Asian's eyes. One night, while Arthur was being tucked in by Kiku, he could not help to notice that his brown eyes had little life in them.

"Don't you think I'm getting too old for being tucked in Kiku?"

He wanted to make some small talk, but received no response. Since that didn't go as planned, he decided to get straight to the point. "You can sleep next to me Kiku…There's no argument against that if you are this weary. How are you supposed to focus if you are tired?"

"You are wrong, I am trained to focus, even when I am in my lowest point," Kiku muttered. Arthur breathed out, irritated, he would have it his way whether the bodyguard liked it or not. He was as proud as his father and he could have his way if he wanted as well. He dragged down the Japanese to him, and was somewhat surprised he didn't protest. "See, nothing to it!"

But Kiku had already fallen to sleep.

* * *

><p>Kiku continued to sleep with Arthur, but tried not to get used to it. He would do it once or twice every week, when sleep cried out the most to be tended to. The Japanese would fall asleep at once, but Arthur enjoyed his presence for the short moments he could stay awake. No one had done this before, not his father, not his mother, and certainly not his brothers. He warmed up to the Asian.<p>

However, their new found bond did not last long. A month later Wang Yao decided to start his training lessons earlier for Kiku since they had been interrupted by his escorts with Arthur to school. The Chinese had knocked on Arthur's bedroom's door, but no one received him in. Yao was of little patience and went in anyways, but to only witness Kiku dozing off on the job, on their Master's bed. He immediately pulled the Japanese up by the arm with one single movement.

Kiku was barely waking up as he was being dragged away. Arthur was the first to fully be aware of what was going on. "Yao, please let him go, I let him sleep with me!"

By then Kiku had fully woken up and found himself in his dire situation. "Yao-san I can explain…"

Yao only slapped him. "Forgive us Master, this will _never _happen again."

In the rest of the day in school, Arthur simply could not focus on his course work. To make matters worse, he did not meet with Kiku in the limousine nor back home. _Did Yao take him away forever? _he thought with dread.

To his relief, Arthur did meet him when he returned from school the next day. "Kiku, could you believe that I thought I would never see you again?" he cried out, clasping the Japanese's hands. As he did so, Kiku's sleeves dropped down and he spotted purple marks on his perfect white skin. "Kiku, no…"

The bodyguard quickly snatched his arms away and looked down in shame.

Something told the blond that those bruises weren't the only ones in his body. "It's my entire fault," he whispered.

"Please Arthur-san, I failed you; you have nothing to apologize."

After that, the British youth did everything he could to make Kiku smile, to make him have a fun time when he brought his friends.

But Kiku distanced himself; he became more "professional" as he would sometimes say.

And then Arthur entered high school.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Alice: Belgium**


	4. Chapter 3

Many changes occurred during Arthur's shift from primary school to high school. Some were natural, such as reaching puberty's full potential. His voice had deepened and his face lost the childish complexion. He was especially proud of his growth spurt; a fact that he would always taunt Kiku whenever having the chance since he was now a head taller than him, in spite of being a couple years younger than the Japanese.

Other changes included, his father remarrying and gaining a new brother from that, a new bodyguard driver, and another maid. As for his new step-mother, he had had no consultation from his father, of course, but he didn't hate her either. He surely wasn't going to call her "mum", but he did have respect for her for being the mother of his new little brother. The little one was named Peter, and was now three years old; however, the age difference didn't help to unite the brothers at all.

As for the new staff in his home, circumstances had called for changes. Wang Yao had strongly recommended to the Kirklands to hire a new driver bodyguard that could completely guarantee Arthur's safety. "Even Kiku has his limits, aru," he had said, "and I know someone that is even more proficient for the escorting job. Bodyguards know bodyguards, and I just know the right person for it, aru."

And so a new driver bodyguard was hired from Switzerland, a man named Vash Zwingli. He was highly skilled with firearms and blades, but also took his driving job as carefully as a weapon, focused and alert. As for the household, they had had only two maids. The first one was an elderly lady that had being of service from a past Kirkland generation. By the time Arthur had reached nine years of age, a new maid was added, the timid one.

The head Kirkland had already planned to hire a new one, so when she had asked if she could recommend another, he couldn't refuse. "Ms. Chernenko, you have been working with us for some years now, so I trust this Miss Natalia Arlovskaya is of trust?" the head Kirkland had asked her. "Oh yes, yes…um, you see, she is an old friend of mine, nothing else!" she squeaked.

As for Arthur's personal life, modifications had occurred as well. From the many friends he had gained in primary school, only Alice had remained loyal. It seemed she enjoyed causing Antonio anguish, but she did truly enjoy Arthur's presence. He did gain many other rivalries (high school is just full of drama), such as his infamous, daily conflicts with the French student, Francis Bonnefoy.

They were like water and oil, they just didn't mix. Francis' mere laughter would aggravate Arthur. On the other hand, he did admit he learned so much from the French than his own father. If he had any uncertainty about what was going around him, or his own body, he would consult Francis. "It's not like I don't have anyone else to go to…" Arthur would start, stammering.

"Hush, hush, my _un jeune," _the French would reply with a smirk, all the while placing his index finger on the English's lips, "you came to the right person."

Arthur's social status also made him quite popular at school, but he knew who were there for friendship, or his money. Even surrounded by most of the college's population, he felt alone. Sure Alice was there, sometimes, and sure Francis was some sort of ally, but their conflicts persisted. Additionally, his social pressures of having the Kirkland name were of no help either.

Arthur began to have personal classes from a tutor his father had hired so he would be able to maintain the family's fortune in the future. Other classes he saw as useless, such as becoming a better "gentleman" for social events. He saw them as unnecessary since he had classes like this in his childhood, but his father wanted "refinement". He simply had no time anymore to do as he wished. That included socializing with his Japanese bodyguard.

* * *

><p>"I want you to be there on the party, Kiku," the blond said, while taking off his waistcoat. Kiku simply maintained his eyes down to avoid contact, a new habit he had established, while passing him his nightclothes. "I will wait outside for you to change, Arthur-san." The Japanese bodyguard made his way out the door, so Arthur decided he would persist when he returned. As he changed, his mind raced in how he could possibly convince the Asian to be a party member in his upcoming birthday celebration.<p>

His father would always conduct parties for his birthday, but he knew they were just to show off his money. This one however, was for his coming of age, and the head Kirkland himself confessed he was proud of his heir becoming a man. Therefore, this particular birthday was going to be special for Arthur, and he, at least, wanted Kiku to enjoy it with him. In the past birthday celebrations, the Japanese bodyguard would be in his most attentiveness and was never there to wish him a happy birthday. And so, as soon as he was finished, he let the Asian in.

"Kiku, I'm telling you in a month's notice. I want you to think about it hard. It's going to be my 18th birthday, so it's going to be _very _important for you to be there to celebrate with me," Arthur continued. For the first time in a long while, the Japanese made eye contact with the English's ones. "Arthur-san, listen carefully, as your biggest celebration, it's when I need to be at my best vigilance.

"I can't risk your life for a mindless let down. At most, this will be the greatest danger in the parties your father has conducted due to the guest size that have been invited-and those who were not. Any assassin can be hiding among the crowds."

Arthur had only caught one word. "_Mindless?"_

"Arthur-san, I didn't mean _your _invitation was-"

"Then why don't you accept?"

"Did you not just hear what I just said?"

Arthur exhaled loudly, "Fine, I understand your concern, at least…just a while."

"…Very well."

Arthur beamed, tapped Kiku's cheek in approval, and went to his bed. "As long as you are there, just for a moment, beside me," he mumbled, "that's good enough." He had fallen fast asleep as soon as he made himself comfortable, a feat that still surprised Kiku. The Japanese bodyguard proceeded to sit in the chair next to the bed, and contemplated the sleeping British youth. His hand lifted to his face and pressed his fingers against the cheek that Arthur touched, and smiled.

The following week, Kiku did not see Arthur again, except in the nights he was in vigilance. Arthur had a busy schedule once again and simply had no time to talk to the Asian, also to Kiku's relief. He did not want to avoid him, but Arthur was getting too close, he couldn't afford that. On such normal days, he would practice his techniques with Wang Yao; the only exception was that this particular day, the Chinese man had been requested by the head Kirkland.

Kiku felt something abnormal was going on with the Kirkland business; he could sense it through Yao, so it was no wonder that the Chinese's presence have been needed even more. And so Yao left Kiku time for himself and simply did not know what to do with it. "He didn't give me any precise instructions, and I hate not being of any use," Kiku muttered to himself.

The Japanese bodyguard walked through the terrace, where he and Yao had been previously training, and passed the rose garden. Arthur was very fond of these flowers and would pass his time taking care of them when he had the time. Kiku enjoyed simply watching him trim the leaves and wanted to join him, but he knew better not to intervene. He knew if he showed interest in Arthur's greatest hobby, well, he simply would not leave the Japanese alone.

But this time, there was no one to stop him to adore the roses, and surely, some relaxation time wouldn't hurt. He made his way to the rose garden and knelt down to the most beautiful he had seen. He simply petted them, or enjoyed their aroma. It was especially a sunny that day, so their perfume was especially strong. Kiku hated to admit, but their smell reminded him of Arthur.

His inner peace, however, was interrupted by female voices. Kiku could not see who they were at first, due to his kneeling position, but their voiced gave them away. The voices belonged to Yekaterina, the timid maid and the newest one, Natalia.

"You made sure they are planted safely?" he heard Natalia say. "Stop following me everywhere, I've been living here for _years _now, I know what I am doing."

"Good afternoon, ladies," Kiku said, raising unexpectedly and surprising the maids. Yekaterina squeaked, and even the impassive Natalia gave a small jump. "Oh, good afternoon to you too…" the platinum-haired girl replied, once composing herself. Yekaterina held a pitch fork, which meant she had being probably working on the garden, and Natalia wore her maid uniform. They were perfectly normal to the eye, but Kiku's intuition told him otherwise.

He knew Yekaterina had recommended Natalia because they had been childhood friends, but their closeness bothered him. It wouldn't hurt to be a little skeptical, so he decided he would accompany them. He did notice their confused complexions, and both began to leave, not finding what else to say; it had been odd that he had caught their attention after all. But Kiku persisted, "I'm going to be available until the late afternoon, so I am happy to be of service."

"That is not really necessary," Yekaterina stammered. "But I insist," Kiku continued, as he went around the rose bush separating them. It was a spontaneous eye movement, but the Japanese caught Natalia roll her eyes. "As you wish," she said, although Yekaterina's body language had said something else. They walked out of the rose garden, and made their way into the household, the three in an awkward silence.

"I have kitchen duty right now, so you can help us in there," Yekaterina spoke up. "Of course," he replied kindly. The silence revived once more as they began to clean the main kitchen. Neither of the three spoke, and Kiku strongly suspected it was because he was there. He knew women loved to chat, so their silence told him there was something in their minds that they wished not to share.

"So, both are childhood friends? Where did you meet for the first time?" Kiku asked, breaking the silence this time. "A long time ago, in Russia," Natalia answered. "A _very_ long time ago, we were very young girls, and we haven't seen each other since…," Yekaterina said. "Until now," Natalia added.

_Is it me, or are they been too general? _Kiku pondered. He had also caught another eye movement from Yekaterina to Natalia, as if waiting for a response from her. They might have been meaningless body movements to a normal person, but to the bodyguard, a whole story had been told. He then deducted they had been more than "childhood friends", that they weren't completely telling the truth.

It was to no surprise that Wang Yao ordered for Kiku to keep an eye on Yekaterina and Natalia the next day. Any suspicious activities from them, and he would immediately report it to him. Although, ever since that encounter he had with the maids, he rarely saw them together again. It was as if they knew he was on to them. It was especially hard to pinpoint their location when the mansion had begun to be filled with people decorating it for the upcoming grand party.

Speaking of which, as the last week before the celebration came, he had begun to regret his promise to Arthur. Kiku hoped he didn't encounter him before the grand day and avoided him, perhaps this way the blond wouldn't remind him to attend and not have to come after all. But he failed.

"Oh Kiku there you are! Have you found what you are going to wear for the party?" Arthur asked.

Kiku's stomach churned. "Arthur-san yes, yes I have," he lied. Now he would have to find a suit in just three days. "You brushed your hair back," Arthur commented. "Huh, oh yes so I have," Kiku replied.

_Where is he getting at with that? _Truth be told, he hadn't noticed his hand automatically working on its own to brush his hair behind his ear. Arthur laughed gently, "You do that when you lie. Here come into the room." Kiku blushed deeply upon been discovered, and had no choice but to obey Arthur.

"The seamstress hasn't left yet, so I'll call her back into this room. I will tell her to make a suitable outfit for you."

"Arthur-san, please, it's not necessary."

"Of course it is necessary, it's going to be a grand party after all," Arthur said, and bent down to kiss him in the cheek. "I want you to look your very best," he added, before turning to leave.

One could call them friendly gestures, but to Kiku, it had made his heart pound hard against his chest.

* * *

><p>"And where are you going with that attire?" Yao asked, making the Japanese jump. "<em>Well…<em>as a bodyguard, I will need to blend in with the crowd, so I won't be recognizable," Kiku responded. He fought to maintain his eye level to the Chinese man. Looking down abashed like he was habited to would give away his true intentions. "That's security's job, aru."

The mansion had been filled with guests from everywhere: family friends, associates, and such. Moreover, the party was held on a special hall on the household for celebrations like this; and now it was being filled with the chatter of people, music, and commotion. In night-time, the party had begun to _truly_ commence. By then Arthur had given a speech to his guests and saluted them all.

As soon as he had completed his duty as host, it was when he had wanted Kiku to accompany him. And so, amongst the commotion, Wang Yao had found Kiku at a corridor, right before entering the ballroom.

"Yes, Yao-san, allow me to explain, I was requested for the Master's personal safeguarding _among _the party. Plus, I already had made sure there were no abnormal movements before the party commenced, so I did do my part already," Kiku said. Yao crossed his arms and twitched his mouth.

"I do suppose…extra caution won't hurt, aru. I will tell you one thing; the Kirkland's enemies have begun to surface."

"Is that what has been bothering you Yao-san?"

"Admittedly, yes. Since today we face the greatest threat yet, I at least wanted to let you know to expect the unexpected, aru."

Kiku always expected the unexpected. Even in his formal attire he hid his tantō, but nevertheless, he was glad that Yao had confessed his fears to him. He must not let his guard down. Yao gave Kiku one more glance, before making his leave, and the Japanese felt the need to breathe out. He certainly wasn't doing anything bad, but the Chinese man surely made him feel so.

Kiku made his entrance and tried not to catch anyone's attention. He frankly felt out of place, even when wearing the right outfit. The seamstress had given him a vest, jacket and trousers just for his size, but at the moment he felt naked. And so he walked aimlessly on the ballroom, saluting here and then those who spotted the Asian.

Then he saw him, truly the spirit of the celebration. He wore a black three-piece suit, along with a top hat; he simply was stunning. Arthur was chatting with a gentleman and his lady, and he had spotted him too. As Kiku remained frozen on the spot, Arthur smiled at him and motioned with his hand to come forward.

The Japanese bodyguard felt his legs pull him to Arthur, but he didn't know what to do with his arms. He had never felt this idiotic before and he hoped it didn't show. "Please, if you could excuse me, but I must attend to a comrade of mine," he heard Arthur say. Kiku couldn't believe he hadn't noticed before, but he found Arthur's accent quite mesmerizing. The two guests went their own way, laughing, most likely from a joke Arthur had said.

Now Kiku had Arthur's full attention. "You don't know how happy it makes me that you decided to come."

"I'm a man of my word, Arthur-san. Did you honestly believe I will break my promise?"

"Not at all, it's just you've…"

The blond trailed off for a moment, and bit his lip.

Kiku couldn't help to lower his eyes to observe that gesture. "Can we go outside?" the blond finally said. Kiku responded with two nods, and followed Arthur towards the courtyard. He surely felt all eyes on him as the host led the Asian outside.

The place Arthur had taken him was to his beloved rose garden. It was not too far from the building and the music was still audible, and that made Kiku calm for some reason. Arthur halted in the middle of the garden, the bright moon behind him, and he extended his arm to Kiku.

"Shall we dance?"

Kiku wasn't sure if he had heard correctly.

The blond must have caught Kiku's stunned expression for he chuckled and advanced towards the Japanese. He stopped just in front Kiku, only inches away. "Here, hold my arm and shoulder," he said as he proceeded to do so himself. Kiku backed away, "are you mocking me?"

"I am not," the blond responded, gently.

"I only want to talk to you. I find this to be the best way."

Kiku was certainly not amused at this request, but an impulse made him obey the blond. Soon enough, he found himself being guided by the British youth and swayed about. The only spots their bodies touched were the hands on the shoulder and the waist; they kept a distance. He also noted that Arthur's hands were shaking slightly.

Arthur was staring down at him, and Kiku avoided him at first, but eventually glanced back. Having the Japanese's full attention, Arthur decided to share his thoughts. "You've been avoiding me, for far too long now."

"I have just being doing my job Arthur-san."

"Yes, but we used to enjoy our company perfectly well before, even without interfering with your duties!"

"You are wrong; I was letting my guard down."

Arthur let go of Kiku. "You resent me don't you?"

"I don't know what you are talking about."

"Yao punished you because of me, and you resent me for it. Why else would had you avoided me so fervently?"

The Japanese bodyguard saw sadness through the captivating, emerald eyes. Eyes that shone under the moonlight. "I had told you, I never blamed you for that…incident. It was simply unprofessional and I deserved whatever punishment I received from Yao-san."

"You always say that. Don't you _know_ how much it tormented me that you distanced yourself from me?"

The music stopped in Kiku's ears, the whole scenery behind him dissolved away. He truly felt it was just him and Arthur, the world had disappeared. That feeling scared him.

"I have felt so alone," Arthur continued. The Asian could sense that these confessions weren't easy for Arthur at all, as he kept glancing down. "Believe it or not, you were the only one that made me feel safe. I don't want to continue this anymore, please…please don't abandon me again."

"I have to leave," Kiku added quickly, "Wang Yao must suspect my long absence by now."

It was true, even if the Chinese hadn't said so, he knew he didn't expect for Kiku to stay too long at the party. "Alright then, just promise me you'll meet me tomorrow after I come back from college, at the gate."

"I'll definitely try."

As the Japanese bodyguard walked away, he could not help to hear whispers from his heart. They told him things he did not wish to hear, so his mind simply brushed them off.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: I sure caused a lot of confusion over the college term did I? I tried to use it less this time. By college I had meant private school since that's what it's called where I live. I'll change it so no one gets confused again**


	5. Chapter 4

Kiku was making his way to his living grounds, but a shadow caught his deft eye. He gracefully moved towards the corner of the main building's wall and peeked. He saw a dark figure kneeling, just below a window, with hands busy on a metallic object. The Japanese's blood began to pump faster with adrenaline as he realized that this was _definitely _not a friendly guest. What the hooded figure held was a bomb; what he faced was a terrorist.

He knew not to attack headfirst, that could cause the terrorist to start off the bomb, or bombs if there were any others. However, any small let down upon the mysterious figure could give him enough time for him to strike. He was sure of his abilities all too well, and so he waited patiently. The terrorist continued to operate the device with tools, as the Japanese silently took his tantō out and…

A sudden pain shot upon his back, as he stumbled down. The terrorist squeaked and dropped her objects. "Careful with _those_, Katyusha!" Natalia hissed. How stupid of him, why hadn't he heard her coming? He had focused _too _much on the terrorist, and not on his surroundings.

Natalia was fast, she was already holding him down, a dagger pressed on his side. "Did you activate it already?" she asked the other. "Yes, we can leave now."

Natalia sneered and pressed her dagger dangerously harder on Kiku's skin. "Wondering why I haven't taken away your pitiful life yet?" she snickered.

Kiku knew he was toying with him before deciding to end his life. She was not just any assassin; the Belarusian was a hunter who loved to play with her food. Kiku did not follow upon her game, so she decided to answer anyways. "You and all of the scum here will blow into _tiny little pieces _when these sweethearts go off."

This was not looking good, Kiku had to do something now. He had to take any sort of action, so he flipped Natalia to her side, gaining a gash at his skin from his daring act, and held her at the same position she had him only moments before. His knee stabbed her back and his hands pressed her head and arms, but she was strong; it took all of his strength to hold her down like this. The terrorist ran to aid her, but Kiku was already threatening his tantō on Natalia's neck. "Don't come any closer, or I'll slit her throat out… Yekaterina."

The terrorist froze at her tracks, and to Kiku's astonishment, began to cry. "Please, _please, _I'll do anything, just don't hurt her!"

"Disgraceful! Do something or just run away, but _never _give in to the enemy!" Natalia yelled.

Kiku stuck a pressure point at her body and she instantly went limp.

Natalia was only worsening the situation, so it was best to handle the one that seemed the easiest to manipulate alone. "You didn't…_You didn't!"_ Yekaterina cried out. "She is only unconscious, if you want for both to get out of here alive, then you will obey my orders," Kiku said, remaining as calm as possible. He ignored the new, increasing throb at his left arm. Yekaterina's eyes closed and huge tears cascaded down her cheeks. A hand then reached inside her jacket and took out a pistol, aiming at him.

"No, my _sestrá _is correct," she replied, her voice strong and firm. And she shot.

The guests inside cried out in alarm. Security immediately took action and ordered the people to stay in place and went outside to see who had fired. Arthur had just entered the hall when the shot had been heard. He had the impulse to step outside once again, but the security police held him back. "Let me bloody go, my friend was still out there!" he demanded.

"I'm sorry Mr. Kirkland, but your safety comes first," one said. _They sound just like damn Kiku, _he thought, and premonition hit him. "There's a bomb alert," another came and said discretely. They didn't want to scare the mass, as scared as they already were, and began to follow procedure. "Mr. Kirkland, we are going to take you and your family to the basement, we will take care of everything here," he heard someone tell him.

But everything went too fast for Arthur, the guests running back and forth were a jumble in his head, and voices were not quite audible. He recalled his father talking to him, Peter and his step-mother sobbing, but he really couldn't take it in. And so with a sudden realization, he knew they could die at any moment.

Even amidst the chaos, security was able to control the situation, and the bombs were deactivated thanks to a brave Japanese bodyguard.

* * *

><p>Arthur walked in the infirmary. Several days had passed since the bomb incident, and he hadn't had the time to visit his dear friend. Because of security reasons, the whole mansion was inspected just in case of any more secret bombs, a feat that took quite a while for the household's immense size. "Forgive me if I hadn't come to visit any time sooner, you know, regulations and all," Arthur said. Kiku placed a closed hand on his lips and chuckled, "I did not expect anything less from security."<p>

"Yes of course," Arthur responded, smiling at the Japanese's sweet voice. "By the way, I wanted to let you know the sisters have finally spoken," he went on. Kiku's initial suspicions had been true, the maids had been more than childhood friends, they had been family. From a start, Yekaterina had planned to be hired as a maid in the Kirkland household to extract information and to kill as well at any given order. Further investigation had also found odd that the timeline that she had been hired was also around the time Arthur's mother had been killed.

The connection had been too strong that it was no surprise that Yekaterina had been the true cause of her death all along. However, her intention was to kill the head Kirkland, but had failed to do so in a confusion of poison placement. That is why Natalia was ordered to correct any of her sister's mistakes, which was why Yekaterina had requested for her to be hired as well. She did not do so right away in order not to raise suspicion, though. Moreover, they had revealed that the sisters were spies to Ivan Braginski, a leader of a Russian mob.

Ivan had held a grudge for a long time over the Kirkland's unfair treatments in business making, and an insult to the Braginski clan meant death. And so, even though the sisters had been captured and their information forced out, intelligence knew better that wasn't the end of Ivan Braginski's schemes. They informed the Kirklands that they were sure to hear more of him now that his sisters were imprisoned by the secret service and highly suggested to tighten their security. But as for now, the lives of many had been saved that night and Arthur was convinced that he and his family would have been blown into smithereens if not for Kiku's initiative.

Currently, the Japanese bodyguard rested in the household's infirmary, his left arm and top shoulder strapped in bandages. "I'm sorry to hear they were responsible for your mother's death. To think the enemy slept under the same roof with us for so many years," Kiku replied to Arthur's comment. The blond in turn, had sat next to him and inspected his wounds. "Don't be, that was a long time ago, I'm concerned about you now."

Natalia had cut deep across Kiku's arm, and Yekaterina had managed to hit him in his shoulder. The Japanese bodyguard had speed at his side that night, and managed to maneuver himself from being shot at a vital place. Security had reacted quickly to the gun fire and arrived at the location in time to see the struggle between Kiku and the Ukrainian. He had managed to trip her from below and was already securing her at the ground once they had come. They helped the Japanese bodyguard handle Yekaterina at once, all the while Kiku gave orders to search for other bombs that he suspected where at the rose garden. And so intelligence was able to deactivate all the bombs just in time due to Kiku's acuteness on the situation.

What everyone admired the most was that he had been able to give and follow instructions so clearly in spite of having been bleeding excessively. All of this Arthur was informed of, and it hurt him that he could not even visit the Asian right away to at least thank him for his bravery. "I had to wait more than one bloody week to be able to see you, can you believe that?" he continued. "It is perfectly understandable, Arthur-san," Kiku replied. Arthur brushed strands of hair away from Kiku's eyes, a gesture that made the Japanese blush and turn his head away.

"You were truly amazing. I want to pay you somehow," Arthur went on. "I won't allow it Arthur-san, I already get paid for doing my job, I don't need any special treatment for merely doing it, as dangerous it may be," Kiku retorted, while pushing the blonde's hand away. "Well you do your job bloody well. If we had someone like you back when my mum was still alive, well…her death could had been completely avoided," Arthur responded.

This time, Kiku found himself staring back at Arthur's jade eyes, founding earnestness in them. "You praise me too much," was all he could say. "Well, I could have lost you, and I hadn't said all the things I've been meaning to tell you," Arthur said softly. Both fixed their eyes on each other, for what seemed an eternity, one waiting for the other to respond. "Like what?" Kiku said, barely a whisper.

"Like, well like…," Arthur began, but coughed to compose himself. "Like that you _honestly_ need more praise. I feel Yao doesn't do so, and you must be his best pupil!"

Kiku exhaled through his nose and smiled, "Yao-san has trained me well, but I don't deserve his praise."

Arthur snorted, "You are too modest. I know that's what you desire the most in the world."

Arthur had deducted correctly, but he knew that deep desire was not for him to ever obtain. He knew Yao loved him, but the Chinese man was proud and would not admit it, and that fact was enough for Kiku. "What, is that how you are planning to pay me then? Yao's praise cannot be purchased. Money can't buy everything you know" Kiku teased.

The blond sat backed down to sit at his own chair, and placed a finger at his temple and crossed his legs, indicating he had begun to think deeply. "What do you really want then?" Arthur said at once. For some reason, Kiku's heart stopped for a second. "Um, well, I told you already, you really don't have to do anything. I was only doing my job," he repeated, his hands fidgeting on the white sheets.

"Your body language says something else, Kiku," the blond said, a playful tone in his voice. He reached out for a hand, from the uninjured arm, and brought it up to his lips to press them gently against the knuckles. That simple touch sent an electric heat wave to Kiku's very core. His heart's whispers began to speak louder than ever and he simple could not hush them down. He knew that all this were playful gestures from the British gentleman, but they have begun to drive him mad.

"I simply can't accept you to personally pay me something," Kiku said, once finding his tongue. Arthur placed the Japanese's hand back to his lap and then caressed the side of his face with the back of his hand. "Then I am forever in your debt," the blond answered.

In the following year, the two had become inseparable. Throughout the course of events, new changes took place, including Arthur graduating from high school and beginning to attend a private university. Since they lived in the metropolis, he did not have to commute somewhere else. He had also begun to work with his father in the family's business and its finances. Being active on the Kirkland's fortune also meant he had to attend his father's favorite hobby, social events.

In those, the nobles and the wealthy cheered for their fortune and talked and laughed about nothing else. Arthur, as the gentleman he had become into, celebrated as well and acted like he was expected to. Nonetheless, he still believed that his social class was nothing but a facade of appearances, and the only true presence that he relished was that of the Japanese bodyguard.

After the incident with Ivan Braginski's sisters, Arthur desired nothing else but to instigate the bond he had with Kiku once again, and the Japanese accepted warmly. It was if Kiku had decided to give another chance to their friendship that had somehow turned forbidden. He was sure that he could enjoy the presence of the blond without letting his guard down as well. After all, he did believe that the best bodyguards were also the likeable ones. If Arthur was to share his private life in order to secure his safety, then surely it was best to have it with a pleasant companion.

Kiku had also finally decided to confess his love for Arthur's rose garden, a fact that made the English's green eyes sparkle with joy. The two would spend timeless hours just rejoicing with the roses, and afterwards lied on the grass to observe the constellations. Their hands would find each other and squeeze gently, transmitting tenderness. Sometimes simple conversation would keep the two entertained. Kiku especially esteemed how Arthur would completely listen to what he had to say, really taking it in.

Most people half hear what one has to say while thinking what they will say in turn. Not Arthur, Kiku believed him as a true gentleman; he always had his eyes fixed on the Japanese, listening intently to every syllable that came from him and then knowing when was the right time to voice his own opinion. Their talk was also accompanied with tea, another interest they shared, and Kiku would sometimes make themselves a snack. Arthur had tried preparing them something as well, but the Asian thought best that he only made their meals.

In one of their many conversations, Kiku had also admitted to the blond another of his deepest secrets. He had a fascination for nature photography. Arthur wasted no time purchasing the best camera for the Asian, a gift he rejected many times out of modesty. In the end, Kiku accepted it whole-heartedly and stored it at a safe place in his room. "So have you taken any snapshots?" Arthur had asked him, thrill in his voice.

"Forgive me Arthur-san," Kiku had replied, his head tilted at one side with a hand pressing at his cheek. "My schedule simply doesn't allow me. I have lessons with Yao-san and my bodyguard tasks don't let me either. Plus I rather spend my only free time with you."

"Then that settles it, we are going to the countryside this week and you are coming with me," Arthur had responded.

"You can take all the snapshots that you want in there and won't have to worry about safeguarding me or anything. I'll have Vash secure the area beforehand."

That day at the countryside was the best experience in Kiku's life, and he thanked Arthur dearly for it. If anything, Kiku felt a strong adoration for the blond, but he also told himself it was nothing more than the feeling of true friendship. Yet, Arthur would stare at him deeply, do certain gestures, say certain things, and that would make Kiku's heart start murmuring things again. Things that he convinced himself were nothing less than illusions, that way, his mind could take over and use logic as a force.

But the nights he watched over Arthur were long, and that was never good for the imagination. In those nights, his mind would fall victim over his heart and it would wander restlessly, each about feelings for Arthur. He could not deny that the blond treated him like no one else, and that did make him feel special. But when those innocent thoughts somehow found their way into recalling the manner his lips curved to smile at him, and the gentle eyes that shone just at his mere sight, and to the smell of roses that emanated from his skin that aroused his senses; well Kiku had begun to believe he had lost it.

Just before he declared himself mad, Wang Yao informed the Japanese that they would return back home for a year. "Master Kirkland has been generous enough to give us a vacation. He truly loves our service so it's no wonder why he has not excused us from our duty yet. That is why he has confessed it was only proper that we be allowed to visit home for being away for so long, aru. About time I say!" Yao told him.

The Japanese bodyguard was frankly happy for the news; it _had _been a long time since he had set eyes on home. He had started to forget how it even looked like. When he informed Arthur the news, he had smiled at him, but it was bitter. He swore that the emerald eyes even lost some shine momentarily, but the gentleman had expressed joy for him nonetheless.

And so presently, Kiku found himself collecting his last remains of property to take to the limo that waited for him. The head Kirkland even offered his services to the bodyguards to arrive safely to the airport, and Vash was to drive them there. "I hope I'm not forgetting anything, um, let's see…," Kiku said, just under his breath. He aimlessly scanned his room, but really, that was no a way to search…He only hoped he wouldn't leave anything behind and turned to the door.

He stepped out and just at the porch, he stumbled upon Arthur. "Not leaving without saying a simple farewell aren't you?" he asked. He wore a grin and a thick eyebrow was raised higher than the other. "Of course not, Arthur-san," Kiku answered with a laugh. "I could never, I was just going to load these in the limo," Kiku lifted his case at this, "and then I was going to see you before leaving."

"Alright, alright, I believe you. Oh, you are taking your camera with you right? I want to see your home. Take hundreds of snapshots will you?" Arthur said. Kiku gave him a low nod, "Yes Arthur-san, it's already packed away."

"Great," the blond replied happily, but then cast his face down. "Well, this is goodbye right, for now at least."

"Of course Arthur-san. I will be back in no time, you just see."

"Okay…"

They were only inches apart, but it felt that a whole mile separated them. It seemed that something else was missing, but both simply did not know what that was. Kiku finally decided he had taken too much time, Vash must have gotten impatient by now, not to mention Yao. "Em, well, good-bye Arthur-san. I must take my leave, everyone is waiting for me."

He bowed to the blond and made his way around him. He certainly knew that was not enough, but what else was he supposed to do? "Kiku wait!" he heard Arthur exclaim. His hand gripped his arm to pull him back to where he had been previously standing. Kiku was surprisingly excited for this act, as if he had secretly wished for Arthur to do this and complete whatever that was missing upon them.

And he had done so, and he eagerly waited for what he had to say so for himself. But he only uttered one word, and he did it so...hypnotizing.

"Kiku…"

The gentleman's hand had elevated up to his face, fingers brushing strands of hair behind his ear, softly reaching down to cup his chin gently. Kiku could not help to bend his neck towards the caress and his mildly closed eyes met the green ones, and fixed themselves there.

He did not know where this was going, it was all by impulse. So that's why his hand found itself placed upon Arthur's face as well, returning the same gesture. The blond then took a single step closer, Kiku did the same. Arthur was leaning his head dangerously close too, but the Japanese did not move. Every inch of him ached to do so, but not his heart, which hammered hard at his chest at the moment.

And so their lips were just centimeters apart.

"I thought that you were having a little trouble with your load, so I decided to come and-"

Kiku immediately snatched his hand and face away from Arthur and took huge steps backwards as soon as he had spotted Vash. "Ah, don't worry, I was helping Kiku with that already. Let's go to the limo shall we?" Arthur said, casualty in his voice. Vash did not utter a single word and simply gave a hesitant nod to the English.

It had been the longest trip for Kiku as the three had walked silently to the limo, none sharing a single glance. Wang Yao had already packed all of his belongings and stood beside the vehicle. "What took you so long, you know I am of little patience, aru."

Kiku avoided making any eye contact with the Chinese and directly sat inside. Yao shook his head and went around the other side, all the while Vash ignited the motor.

Arthur was just outside Kiku's seat, supporting himself against the door. "Good-bye then," he told the Japanese, half smiling. "Yes, until…next time."

The blond slammed the door close and the limo drove away. Kiku did not look outside the window pane and neither did Arthur glance back.


	6. Chapter 5

"I really want to know everything you did in your country."

"Everything? I wouldn't know where to start…I did plenty of things."

"Well, it is a long trip back home."

Arthur Kirkland and Kiku Honda had reunited again. At the moment they sat comfortably in Arthur's limousine as Vash Zwingli drove. In the year that he had been gone, the Kirklands had to move farther away from the city for high security reasons. For that reason, the Briton had to travel several hours to the airport station just to see him arrive, also flattering the Asian in the process. And now all the blond wanted was to hear him talk about his whole year's experience.

"Where to start?" Kiku pondered, placing a hand on his lips. "Well may I know why Yao couldn't return? I know the details, but well, I want to hear it from you," Arthur answered. Kiku was slightly taken back; he didn't think his brother would have been brought up so soon.

"Is something wrong, Kiku?" Arthur asked, concerned about the Japanese's reaction. Kiku quickly recovered with a warm smile and glanced out the window. The city had begun to melt into nature. But to Kiku's eyes, a certain scene was projected on the window pane, only visible to him.

_It was a gray day, a feature that hadn't certainly made the Japanese feel any better about the recent news he just received. And also right a month before departing. Anxiety took over and he forgot about the green tea he had been making. He immediately went to see Yao, who had been taken to his bed by that time, and bent to his knees and imprisoned the Chinese's hands to his own. "What has taken over you?" the proud Yao demanded. His cousin Li Xiao Chun, who was already accompanying Yao, was expressionless as ever and merely blinked at the Japanese sudden burst._

_"I came as soon as I was informed of your condition!" Kiku stated. Yao seized his hands away from Kiku and sat up at the bed's edge. "I'm not going to die, if that's what you are crying about! I still have many years and should not even be restrained to the shameful condition of bedridden, aru," Yao shouted. "Yao- ge ge, it is wise if you don't express yourself so…passionately," Li advised. Yao shot him a look, but such intimidations didn't affect the young Asian and had no choice to give in to his warning._

_Kiku continued kneeling down with his head low after what Yao had retorted at him, so Yao couldn't help to relax and recline against the pillow. "I am grateful about your true concern Kiku, but you already knew about my sickness. We all knew I would fall ill one day," Yao murmured. Kiku's head shot up at this._

_"You're staying right?"_

"_I have no other choice, the doctor forbid me from travelling. But at least the way I see it, I'm glad I fell ill here. I would have gone mad if I had to be imprisoned in a foreign country," Yao said. "Then I'll stay too!" Kiku said._

_Li got up from his seat and strolled past them and simply opened the door to leave. As emotionless he could be, he did know how to sense the mood. Yao was thankful for that as the moment called for him to let go of his pride. "No, you must return Kiku. Our family's reputation depends solely on it, aru."_

_"I can't leave you like this, not knowing your health is diminishing," Kiku replied. "I have many others to depend on, don't let that concern you. You must go back and complete our task, even if it is just you. I know you can do it, I raised you after all," Yao continued. But Kiku's uneasiness did not fade away, and Yao could easily read it on his face and on his silence._

_The Chinese man rubbed his neck and ordered his thoughts thoroughly; he knew it was not going to be easy to confess himself. It was not every day he would let down his pride after all, not even for a family member. "Kiku, not only did I raise you, but I taught you all I know as well, aru. You can do this on your own, you are ready."_

_Kiku had finally lost his inner battle as his eyes swelled up with large tears. Kiku had no recognition of his parents, the only fatherly figure he had known was Wang Yao. Everywhere Yao went, he went. He had never in his life departed from Yao; home was where the Chinese man was._

_And now destiny was to tear him apart from him. Yao had pulled out the last straw as he had admitted Kiku's competence, even throwing away his pride to appease him, and that was why he had gasped out to cry and embraced Yao. In response, the Chinese squeezed him back and kissed his head._

"_Always remember, you are my pride."_

"I would've been proud myself. Matter of fact I am. I cannot imagine the idea of living so far away from home by myself," Arthur spoke up once Kiku had concluded. On the other hand, Kiku could not help to smile at this since he had already gotten used to the idea. Wang Yao's praise had boosted his confidence so much that he felt he could take on the world.

And so he playfully replied, "But I will have you, so I don't think I will ever get lonely."

The Briton's lips slightly opened and his cheeks flushed momentarily, but then proceeded to shift about his seat to try to recompose himself. Kiku had not expected for him to react so strongly, but he simply ignored it. "Of course, I uh…Oh I see you brought your photo folder with you," Arthur pointed out.

"Yes, would Arthur-san like to see?" Kiku asked, but had already begun to take his photos out nonetheless. He handed them to Arthur one by one, and the blond breathed out in awe as he observed them. "_Blimey_ Kiku! These are amazing!"

"Please don't exaggerate Arthur-san…"

"No, quite frankly Kiku, you have gotten better! Now don't give me that look, I know I'm no expert but I recognize beauty when I see it!"

Kiku's humbleness was just too strong and he continued to deny all of the blonde's compliments. "Arthur-san, you know I don't have the true experience! It's just a hobby and I am merely an amateur," he said. "That's called talent Kiku, and I recommend you to become a professional," Arthur suggested. "That's impossible, I'm a bodyguard," the dark haired man insisted.

Arthur looked straight at him to the eye and said, "Are you a bodyguard because you want to? Or just because you have no other choice?"

"You know the answer and no one other than you should know any better. This is my family's inheritance Arthur-san, and I have accepted it proudly," Kiku answered. "I know Kiku, but look at these angles!" Arthur persisted, showing the current photo he held.

It was true, his skills as a bodyguard had enhanced his ability to take shots that no one could dare to do, or have the patience. "I am truly happy I had the opportunity to do what I had always longed for back home, but now that longing has become an experience. I can live my life with fulfillment. I think there is nothing better than that, don't you think Arthur-san?"

The blond continued to frown, but did not press on.

Kiku thought better to change the subject and talked about other experiences he thought worth mentioning from his vacation. Arthur listened intently, as the gentleman he was, and soon enough time had flown by. Kiku had been taken back when Vash opened the door and greeted them. "Mr. Kirkland, Mr. Honda. We have arrived."

Both stepped out, but only Kiku had stopped to view his new surroundings. This new mansion was a bit smaller and old-fashioned, with a forest embracing it from behind. However, this observation was not to demean it at all, it was the perfect place to be one with nature. But the decision to move here was not based on vacationing, but rather for the remote location the mansion was in. Since Kiku and Yao had been gone for a year, the Kirklands were mandated to move away because Natalia and Yekaterina had escaped from jail, and now Ivan was actively operating again. That had been why the government strongly advised for the family to move into hiding and so far they had faced no danger.

"You like it? This was our family's home from many generations. It's amazing how much it has endured," Arthur told him. "It's always good to go back to your roots," Kiku agreed. After taking in his new home, the Japanese went to help Vash to unload his luggage.

As he carried a load and entered the mansion, he could not help to think. Kiku was glad that Arthur had not brought up their incident from a year ago at the limo. He had denied it ever happened after all, but he was afraid the Briton did not and would revive the experience to him. Fortunately, he had not, and so Kiku was convinced that it had all been something his imagination had conceived, maybe even a dream. _Anyways it's foolish to think that we could ever…_

"Kiku are you well? You look pale," he heard Arthur say. "It is a bit cold here, that is all," he replied, a little too fast. "I see…well I'm sorry I won't be able to take you to your room, but I'll have Vash escort you there. I have some pending business I left behind and now must tend to. But when you are done, you are free to explore as you please," Arthur replied.

Kiku did as he was told and followed Vash deeper into the mansion, taking many turns that he hoped he would soon memorize, and received a key from Vash. "This is the key to your room. Never lose it," Vash told him, handling him the said object. "If you have any other concerns, my room is there, right in the corner," he went on. "I am to inform you of all the new regulations anyways, so as soon as you are done unpacking we can start."

Kiku nodded and thanked him. He began to open the door to enter it, but Vash caught his attention again. "I am aware that Mr. Wang could not return, so if you want, you can train with me."

Vash had never made this sort of offer before, being the reserved man he was, so Kiku gave him a deep bow of appreciation.

"That's not necessary you know… just a simple nod or 'thanks' suffices," Vash stammered. And so Kiku learned a new thing that day: Vash was not the cold man he thought he had been. He really was a man of concern, but it made him wonder what had made him so aloof…It was not like something had to _happen _to make someone a certain way, but simple natural intuition told him something else.

And so the day progressed and Kiku had finished with his room and met with Vash as planned and night soon followed. Because of such lateness, Kiku decided it was no time do any of his "exploring" and besides, he wanted to do it with Arthur. He had to admit; he had missed him and wanted to catch up with any events that had gone on in his absence. So many years living under the same roof could not be easily disregarded. Thinking of which, that made him realize something about his bond with Arthur.

As he lay down in his bed, he smiled. It was decided, the reason he cared deeply for him was merely out of custom and he could sleep peacefully with that thought in mind.

* * *

><p>The next morning and the following days after that were a bit hectic. The Japanese bodyguard had to learn by heart every single room in the mansion and all the routes from the forest. He obtained a new schedule as well as his responsibilities had shifted. Arthur had been leaving the household constantly and so it became Vash's accountability to look after him. In turn, Kiku was to take care of Peter, just the same way he did when Arthur was a boy.<p>

It revived the caring "mother" in the brown eyed man again, especially when Peter lacked the real model of one. While Arthur's mother had died tragically, Peter's mother on the other hand was simply not there for being young and inexperienced. Basically, she simply did not care for Peter. However, unlike Arthur, Peter had quickly adapted to the bodyguard and followed him everywhere like a duckling. To Kiku's amusement, he could not help praising himself that it could conceivably be because of the experience he had obtained by taking care of Arthur before.

Like all young boys, Peter loved to play outside activities and if the Japanese bodyguard's presence was not enough, he would beckon him to play along. Kiku gladly did so. And so parenting Peter slowly became his new habit and rarely saw a glimpse of Arthur anymore. For the same reason his night shift with Arthur had been swapped, Kiku could not talk to him properly, and in the mornings he was already gone. He did miss their talks, but Peter's presence was comforting as well.

And so on a certain day of May in which the breeze was just fine and the sun gently kissed the skin, the bodyguard watched over Peter play when Vash approached him. "You would make such a great father," Vash told Kiku, giving him one of his rare smiles. "Vash-san," Kiku responded simply, as to say hello. "Nope, Kiku is my older brother!" Peter voiced in, "I have a father already, and the jerk is never here for me so Kiku is my only brother."

"Young Peter, you shouldn't say disrespectful remarks about family members," Kiku said. The youth pouted and let his head drop. "If you say so…," he muttered, not daring to go against the Japanese. Vash chuckled at this, a gesture that made Kiku twirl towards the Swiss. "Vash-san, you are acting strange today!" Kiku laughed.

Vash's ears turned red and he could not help to wander his eyes to any direction but the brown eyes. "You see, it reminded me of my-" Vash said with a stammer but immediately stopped. Kiku's senses told him there was something more again, even when Vash did not proceed. "Our routines have been changed once more. We will have the same training schedule, so you can continue doing it with me. The Master will inform you the details," he said once composing himself.

"I will talk to him then, but I do not understand. Will I still look after Peter?" Kiku asked. The young boy perked up his head at this. "You are not abandoning me aren't you?" he said hoarsely. Vash came closer to Peter and squatted to his level, followed by a ruffling of the hair.

"Kiku, and even I, will always be here for you, right Kiku?" Vash said. Kiku smiled gently and nodded. "Oh, okay…," Peter breathed out. Vash stood up to face Kiku and said, "Well back to what I was telling you…technically yes you will look after Peter but Mr. Arthur will be having guests over next week. That means you will go back to securing the house for him. "

"Very well. Are the guests the ones he has been visiting to?" Kiku asked. "The very same. You will make sure Mr. Arthur is safe, naturally, but the guests can be a threat as well. You never know who could be a spy," Vash responded. "Yes, that is understandable," Kiku said. Suddenly, he had an epiphany; the Japanese realized he could spend more time with Arthur again, but apparently that thought manifested itself.

"You are excited to be with him again aren't you? But I warn you, you might not find the same Arthur when you do…,"Vash commented. Kiku did not know what to make out of this, and Vash did not continue either. _I guess I will find for myself, _he thought.

* * *

><p>On a late afternoon of the following week, Arthur's guests had finally arrived. Kiku had especially made sure the household was as safe as he could find it, but he could not help to feel anxious. Surely, Vash would be there too if anything <em>was<em> to happen and now that Kiku had the opportunity to train with the Swiss, he had experienced firsthand the man's abilities. He pitted the unfortunate soul who ever had to take him on in a real battle.

As the party commenced and he patrolled the place, Kiku only recognized one of the guests, Alice, the Belgium childhood friend of Arthur. And surely enough she recognized him too. "Kiku! You hardly changed at all!" she said, followed by an embrace. "I must say quite the opposite Alice, you have been transformed into a beautiful woman," Kiku said, sincerely.

He suspected she had must been accustomed to such remarks for Alice maintained composure. "But really, you've grown taller, that's all. I mean sure you are quite handsome too!" she laughed. "I must take it back it then, you haven't changed at all. You are as straightforward as ever," Kiku said with a chuckle.

Arthur then stepped in the two's small talk, politely as ever, followed by a man with shoulder-length blond hair. Needless to say, Arthur wore his best attire and had his charming grin painted in his face already. "I see both have reunited already, it has been quite some time hasn't it?" Arthur remarked. "Quite!" Alice squeaked.

"I also wanted to introduce you to Francis. I never got the chance to do so before," he went on and motioned his hand to the French man. "So you are the famous Francis," Kiku said, a smile escaping from his lips. Arthur had gone through a ranting phase involving the certain French man back when he was in high school that the Japanese had to undergo. "_Bonjour, _and so you must be the famous Kiku Honda as well," Francis replied. "Yes so it seems…," Kiku answered, unsure of what this meant.

"Well you see, our Arthur here talks a lot of you," Francis went on. "Please excuse me, another guest is just arriving so I'll make my leave for now," Arthur said quite unexpectedly, and did just so. Alice shrugged her shoulders not seeing anything to talk about and made her leave as well. And with that, the amused French and the baffled bodyguard were left among themselves. "Don't think much of it, things will get clear one day," Francis told Kiku.

"Please forgive me, but I have no clue what you mean," Kiku replied, finding himself bemused. Francis simply patted the Asian on the back and walked away. He decided Francis was only playing mind games with him, a fact that Arthur had told him about the French was a professional at, and so he simply brushed it off. And so as the party progressed, Kiku simply faded away in the background and observed for any suspicious movements. However, Arthur never returned to Kiku and was completely engrossed in the party instead.

But it should be this way, the bodyguard securing the location and his liege minding his business. At least that was what the brown eyed man told himself over and over again. He found silly that just some few years ago he would completely avoid Arthur too, but now he longed for his companionship. Yao always drilled in Kiku's head that he should never equalize with their patrons, yet he knew he and Arthur were true friends. They had also learned how to cope to the Japanese's profession to not get in the way when it came to having a good time.

And so as Arthur had a good time without him this time, and the laughter of the guests echoed all throughout the drawing room, Kiku felt a tight knot in his stomach for not being a part of it. _I should be ashamed for having such feelings, _Kiku scorned himself at his invidious thoughts, but he could not help it.

As night passed by, the guests began to depart and only Francis and Alice were left. Kiku witnessed as they laughed nonstop and their alcohol from their glasses flew everywhere. He had never seen Arthur so happy, or rather drunk. Surely in a normal state he would have never allowed any beverages spills in the carpet either. It seemed that they would never leave either, until Alice stood up and announced that her driver should be arriving soon. "Besides, a lady shan't stay for too long, even in a gentleman's house," she added.

Francis followed suit and so Arthur accompanying them outside as the Japanese bodyguard tailed behind. It was chilly outside, and so while they bid farewell, Kiku offered Arthur a coat. "I'm going in right now, don't be a bug," Arthur retorted.

"Ah, yes of course…"

The blond turned back and went up the stairs once the cars have completely disappeared.

His walk was a bit unsteady and Kiku thought best to hold him before he tripped over. In response, Arthur pushed him away, rather roughly too. "I'm no child anymore Kiku, you don't have to be holding me up anymore," he snapped. Kiku eyed him in disbelief. Sure Arthur acted like this most of the time, but never to him, at least not since childhood.

"If you want to baby someone, there's Peter. I think I can take care of myself," he continued. Both stood outside of the double door entrance, not saying anything, but Kiku finally found his tongue, "I think Peter needs you more than me."

Arthur began to laugh at this, all the while giving the dark haired man his back.

Kiku was not easy to upset, but he certainly did not see anything funny at what he had just said. At this point it seemed a good idea to go to Peter's room instead of accompanying the blond with is attitude, but duty called and he had to watch over Arthur that night. He thought better not to insist on Arthur's family matters at the moment, and kept quiet instead. Surely it was just the alcohol speaking.

* * *

><p>But it wasn't only the alcohol. Arthur was still the kind and caring gentleman towards Kiku, but he sensed that he began to distance himself away from him. Apparently the trips to the parties had been constant after he had left for his homeland. He had learned this from Vash as they were training one day, some weeks later after the certain party. They were having small talk while warming up before their exercises and Kiku had decided to slip in how he had noticed Arthur's change, just as Vash had warned.<p>

"And so he reconnected ties with Mr. Bonnefoy and has attended every social party in existence with that man. Really, he has become more like his father…"

Vash trailed off at this. "Do not worry, I will keep everything to myself," Kiku reassured the Swiss. The two continued flexing their muscles and cleared their thoughts before voicing them out. "Well, I suppose I can tell you one thing, I knew you were close to Arthur and so...,"Vash muttered.

Kiku froze at a bending position. He slowly got up to face Vash who had been stretching his arms at the moment. "I admit we do have a strong bond, but I am nothing but his bodyguard," Kiku said slowly in order to stress himself. Vash stopped stretching at this as well. "I never said you were actually _something _to him," he replied.

Kiku suddenly felt he was in a trapped position, pinned against an invisible wall. Of course he didn't ask it that way…what had he _meant_ by that? Apparently he had not chosen his words carefully at all. "I-I-I…" he could not help to stutter.

Suddenly memories of that day flushed in. The day when he almost kissed Arthur. He never admitted it that way, it was simply a moment of confusion to him. But now he was positive Vash had truly witnessed too. Kiku lost his voice and was paralyzed as memories he had suppressed began to surface from the time Yao had severely punished him for his unprofessionalism.

He felt himself wince as the memory became even more real in his mind. A stinging sensation of pain from Yao's bamboo stick was felt as he recalled that time...

"_You cannot love the one you protect, aru. It is the ultimate weakness!" Yao yelled, enforcing it with a slash to the shoulder. "But I have no such feelings! He is my friend!" Kiku cried out, both in pain and protest._

_Another slash at the back, this time making Kiku collapse. "Love comes in many ways. You must never make this mistake again or next time it will be fatal, aru."_

"_I don't understand at all, please…!"_

"_If you love Arthur then-"_

"Kiku!"

The Asian snapped back to reality and finally found his tongue. "What I meant is that Arthur is my friend, but I do not _love _him as you suspect," Kiku answered calmly. In fact he had responded too calmly that it had even surprised him. Vash let out a deep breath and put a hand on his hip.

"I have never told this story to anyone, but I think best that you should know. You will understand when I am finished," Vash said. "I am all ears then," Kiku replied.

* * *

><p>That very same night Kiku found Arthur serving himself wine in one of the kitchenettes. He had come to drink some water, but now that he had found the blond by himself… he thought best to converse and bring up something that was gnawing him inside. "Arthur-san, I recall you telling me once that tea was the best beverage in the world. Don't you think perhaps it would be best if I made tea for both?" he inquired. Arthur eyed Kiku then back to the bottle of wine, and then back to him with a smile.<p>

"I certainly would love to."

"You can wait in the living room as I boil the water," Kiku said, taking the glass and bottle away from Arthur. The blond obeyed and Kiku commenced to make their tea. Once the said tea was prepared, he took it to the awaiting Arthur and placed the cups in the tabletop and sat next to him. "We haven't talked for quite a while have we?" Kiku asked already kneeling down on the cushioned mat.

"I knew this was going somewhere," Arthur said, adding a smirk. "I do not understand, we used to do this all the time," Kiku added. "Well, we still can if you want," Arthur replied, taking a sip of tea. "That would be lovely, of course your busy schedule can get on the way…"

Arthur chuckled, "I have been neglecting you have I?"

"It does not bother me. I am simply your bodyguard; I have no say over your life…unless it involves safeguarding it of course."

Kiku caught a slight cringe of the fingers that were placed on Arthur's tea cup with his keen eye. "Of course we are friends too, good friends just having a good time, nothing else…"

Arthur placed his cup down. "You are implying something aren't you?"

"It is what it is, all I'm saying that we are nothing more than friends right? At least, for a bodyguard and his liege."

Arthur was eyeing the brown eyed man with an incredulous look. Then, a new game began, a game in which the two could not afford to blink, a flutter of the eyelashes could mean anything.

But it was Arthur who lost the game as he sighed and leaned back on his hands and closed his eyes. "I feel like a fool, and here I thought you could feel something deeper than that," Arthur found himself saying. It seemed to Kiku that Arthur had managed to read his motives, and now it was the moment of truth as he proceeded to the next step, "I understand how you feel, it's okay to feel that way, I felt that way too, but I realized it's nothing but habit."

Arthur gave him one of his now famous sarcastic laughs. "You really don't understand don't you?"

"I understand one thing. If you feel anything for me, it can be nothing else but friendship. I don't want us to drift apart again just because you want to protect me either."

The Briton was now gawking at him. "And I thought I was the fool! All this time I've been avoiding you because I could no longer stand you being who you are! You remind me of it all the time: 'I am nothing but a bodyguard'. It hurts, Kiku, especially when I…"

Kiku waited for him to continue, but secretly wish he didn't. He wanted to run out of there, however, he needed to clarify some things first. "After you left, I didn't think it would have affected me so strongly," Arthur continued, "I didn't realize you were such a huge part of me. I had taken you for granted…but at the same time I hated that dependence."

As Kiku did not interrupt, the blond went on, "At first I thought I just cared for you as the brother I ironically never had. But I know you were more, and I tried to run away from that fact."

Kiku had planned to set apart any differences that were distancing them apart and to establish their friendship bond again, but things were taking a sharp turn. His previous apprehension to leave from fear of hearing a confession had melted away as his heart fell for the dangerous trap.

"When I did realize that I needed you more than a friend, I wanted to escape from myself because something told me you could never return the same affection. I guess that's why I pretended I was someone else, that I was uninterested of you," Arthur said. Kiku just listened, feeling out of place and somewhat awkward. He did not know what to do with his hands, he felt he had to do something with them, maybe drink from the tea cup…No, it seemed inappropriate at the moment.

It wasn't easy for Arthur either, but he had already opened up himself to the Japanese and knew it was too late to stop. "But back on that day, it was the time I had been confident that I loved you and I wanted to know if you felt the same so I…I," Arthur stammered. "You tried to kiss me," Kiku whispered. "And so…do you?" Arthur asked, coming closer. At this point Kiku had forgotten why he had been there in the first place. "My heart says so, but I'm afraid…"

Arthur brushed his lips to Kiku's, pressed gently, and leaned back again. "What are you afraid of?" Arthur purred. Yao had told him once why, and Vash had reminded him earlier that day, and yet he could not reply. His judgment was now clouded with emotions from that taunting kiss. "It's forbidden," Kiku said, once finding his tongue.

Arthur's lips formed a smile at this and pecked Kiku's mouth once more, gently as ever.

"If that's so, you have nothing to worry about. I have influence after all," Arthur said. Now Kiku was baffled at this and searched for an answer in the emerald eyes. However, at this point he could not read the blonde's mind by his gestures, his own mind was not even clear. All he could see was the Briton coming closer again to kiss him.

This time he stayed longer, caressing his lips against the rims of Kiku's mouth, searching for a response. Kiku refused to kiss back, everything inside him told him to flee, but at the same time he was allowing Arthur to part his lips further. _What are you waiting for? You know you always wanted this, go ahead, he loves you back, _his heart begged. And so Kiku found himself obeying and pressed back.

Again, he did not know what to do with his body as his hands rested unsurely in his laps. He also felt overwhelmingly dizzy and his clumsy lips seemed to have a mind of their own too. But the blond sure knew what he was doing as he felt his shirt be untucked and a sly hand finding its way to his skin. Where Arthur's fingers trailed, a burning sensation was followed by that sent a rush to his head. Kiku thought best to do something with his own hands and searched across Arthur's chest.

The blond then pressed him closer, compelling Kiku to do the same as his arms found their way round Arthur's neck. They had never being so intimately close before, not even the few times they had slept together as children or the night they waltzed among the roses. Their proximity heated up the kiss as their lips were completely in sync with each other. Kiku desired for even more and parted his lips wider so the Briton could give him want he wanted.

Arthur passionately responded back as he slipped in his warm tongue into Kiku's mouth. By now their bodies completely faced each other, longing for each other. On Kiku's mind there was nothing more but the need to have Arthur's very essence as he deepened the kiss. He dared venture into Arthur's mouth as well, savoring the flavor of tea and whatever else that only the blond could taste of. Arthur moaned at the new sensation of Kiku's tongue massaging inside of him as the Japanese was losing his previous insecurity.

If possible, he held him even closer, wanting to make sure Kiku knew how strongly he longed for him. He gripped the Asian's hips securely with one hand as another touched more and more. Arthur did not want to let go now as he finally had the man he loved so much so close and their feelings pouring in with every caress, but Kiku parted suddenly, gasping for air. "Are you okay?" Arthur asked softly.

Kiku felt abashed now that he had paused and could not even bring himself to answer. He pressed his head on Arthur's shoulder and left it to rest there, knowing he had turned bright red. Kiku felt Arthur's chest tremor against his own as he chuckled lowly. The blond decided to do the same gesture to comfort the dark haired man and both remained cuddling like that for a long tender moment.

Kiku had never felt secure along with a powerful feeling of belonging at the same time. Their hearts were beating at the same and their breathing was in unison as well. Kiku was truly captivated at the moment and was convinced that nothing could possibly go wrong. Then he felt Arthur's mouth damp his neck and advance to suck and bite softly at him. Kiku could not suppress a whimper by the new activity at his neckline and buried his face on Arthur's nape. The aroma of roses penetrated Kiku's nostrils at that position, and he took it in deeply.

That scent always aroused a hungry beast within Kiku that he could not quite describe. Was it what they called 'lust'? It seemed so as Arthur's lips trailed up to his ear and licked there, making that beast even stronger. In amidst the craze, Arthur stopped and panted warmly at the slender man's ear, causing a pleasant chill in him. "I love you, Kiku," the blond whispered.

And the spell was broken. Kiku pushed back Arthur and stood up at once. He regretted doing so seconds later, realizing what he had just done was not acceptable _at all_. "Please forgive me!" Kiku cried out and pulled Arthur back up. "It's…fine," Arthur replied, still taken back.

He still was quite shocked at Kiku's reaction, but perhaps Kiku was still a little nervous and decided to reassure him by embracing him. But Kiku only slapped his hands away, "No, don't touch me ever again. This was not supposed to happen…"

"Kiku, relax, no one has to know," Arthur reassured him.

"That's not it, just don't…don't you dare do that again or I'll, I'll-"

It was worse than Arthur thought apparently, as Kiku had turned pale and his body shook in trepidation. He even saw tears escape from the chocolate eyes he loved so much. "I understand, if it's time that you want, I can respect that," Arthur murmured.

Kiku hands suddenly went over his mouth, eyes widening, as he walked backwards slowly. "It's okay Kiku! Please don't act this way, I will have everything under control," Arthur persisted, taking careful steps towards the alarmed Japanese. "You do not understand, step back! I made a huge mistake, this wasn't supposed to happen!" he kept on repeating.

But it did happen and it could not be taken back. He had finally let his emotions take over and their feelings confessed in the act of a kiss. Such actions could not simply be disregarded so easily, Kiku knew this too well and cursed himself for falling so low. How mortified he felt upon realizing the way he must had looked: his shirt undone and his hair a mess! Even after Yao's strict discipline, even after Vash's tragic story…he had submitted to the deadly trap of love. This was just proof that he could not even have control over his own actions and felt weak for this.

So did that mean he had to leave? If he stayed now that he had poured out his feelings openly to Arthur and the latter had expressed the same, did it mean that he would not be able to concentrate anymore? He did feel oddly giddy when they exchanged kisses and acted upon instinct, not logic. Was that proof that love _blinded _as Yao had put it long ago? All these questions spun inside Kiku's head causing his blood go cold.

Then again, Arthur seemed oblivious to what really happened. "I told you Kiku, it doesn't matter what they say! They will not dare make your life difficult when it comes to me, their greed for money won't allow it," Arthur said. "You truly don't understand don't you…?" Kiku gasped. Arthur's thick eyebrows knitted, puzzled at this.

At least with that, Kiku felt he still had the advantage over Arthur's misinterpretation.

If he didn't truly know why their love was forbidden, then he could mislead to the blonde that he did not love him back due to society's criticisms. This way he will not have to leave unexpectedly the job, and all he had to do was not to think of Arthur's love and they should be safe. "…I can't risk it. Both of our reputations…I won't allow it. You can stay with your 'social friends' I am happy as I am."

Arthur frowned and seemed rather disappointed. He opened his mouth, but found no reason to argue with the obstinate Japanese. The two turned to leave and went to their rooms without a single word of goodnight.

* * *

><p>Kiku distanced himself again, but this time even more from the time they had been younger. He avoided complete eye contact, became a wall to Arthur when he talked to him, and practically became invisible when he wasn't needed as a bodyguard. Arthur was convinced Kiku was simply not ready, at first, but as time flew by he gave up hope little by little and began to avoid him as well. The only thing that will keep them together at one place is Kiku having to look after him. Throughout the several months that passed, Kiku did have to use his abilities for life threats due to hidden bombs or planned attacks, but he stopped them flawlessly.<p>

In the end, Kiku was able to focus and function correctly but nonetheless he did not want to risk letting his guard down for his selfish feelings. It did pain his chest so much the way Arthur had finally begun to understand that Kiku will not return his affection. But it was all done for the Briton's safety. If he kept his distance while safeguarding Arthur at his social events without having to interact with him, than everything would be fine.

At least that's what Kiku thought.

"Kiku, all the time I've come here, you have never joined us! Aren't you close friends with Arthur and Alice?" Francis said across the room to Kiku. Presently, Arthur had invited only Francis and Alice to visit (which was really Francis' planning) and the trio conversed comfortably in the main living room.

Meanwhile, Kiku was sitting on a tall stool while studying a blueprint of a building that the Kirklands were to visit for a social event in the future. "I never said anything until now because I did not imagine that you actually had to ask for permission to have a good time. I thought you two were beyond that," Francis added. "Yes, Arthur why haven't you invited him to join us?" Alice agreed. Arthur fidgeted uncomfortably on his seat at the position he was being placed at.

"I apologize, how rude of me. Kiku, would you please join us?" Arthur requested. Kiku did not know if he decided to go on with this out of his gentleman code, or actually doing it as an excuse to talk to him. One thing for sure, Kiku could not refuse a direct order from the blond and bowed his head as a response. "It will be my pleasure," he answered. For the first time in a long time, the two exchanged glances and a smile.

To Francis or Alice, it would seem like any normal, friendly gesture, but to the Briton and the Asian, it was a mask to the tension they felt inside. Kiku sat next to Francis, facing Alice and Arthur. "Both should be ashamed! The two have known Kiku for so long and until know I will finally have the chance to speak with him," Francis said. "We do go way back don't we?" Alice stated.

"We used to have so much fun when we were kids. Kiku would not want to join in at first, but Alice had a way to bring out the competiveness out of you," Arthur said. "Ah yes, actually both of you were as equally spirited…and aggressive. It's no surprise you always ended up fighting in the end," Kiku said. Alice laughed wholeheartedly and added, "But Kiku would be the mediator and made us friends again."

"Pity, I would have loved to have such a childhood with the three of you," Francis said, with a sigh. "I'm rather glad you weren't part of it actually," Arthur said. "What does that supposed to mean?" Francis said, raising his voice. Alice resumed laughing and Kiku could not help to do so too. It seemed that pretending to have a good time along with the presence of Arthur might have not been so hard after all.

"You see, there was a lot of drama when we were younger, and honestly, I think you would've made it worse," Alice said. "Agreed," Arthur said smugly. "_Absurdité!_ I believe I would have done quite the opposite!" Francis argued. "If that's so then you were really needed in one point," Alice said, placing the index finger on her lips.

Kiku's stomach churned, and he was pretty sure Arthur's did too. "Kiku would still hang out with us, but he wasn't necessarily direct what he said to Arthur, or even looked at him. And when my brother Govert and Kiku began to befriend each other, Arthur didn't like it one bit and would fight him," Alice reminisced. She laughed again, "I am so glad that is over now right gentlemen?"

Kiku wanted to change the subject in any way possible without seeming obvious. He rummaged his head for a witty answer and at the first possible response, the Asian found his tongue. "Yes, but you are forgetting that Arthur would fight a lot for you as well. Antonio would do anything in his hands to take you apart but he fought for your friendship," Kiku said. Alice played with her hands at this and Arthur sat up straight.

A premonition told him to stop, but he foolishly went on. "And if I am correct, Arthur had a soft spot for you as well. Alice, I have told you and I will tell you again, you have blossomed into a beautiful woman. I wouldn't be surprised if Arthur still liked you."

Kiku mentally cursed at himself. "Didn't you tell me that yourself back when you attended high school?" Kiku asked Arthur.

Kiku wanted the earth to swallow him up and disappear forever. He was not worried one bit about Alice; in fact she loved this kind of attention. It was about Arthur; he didn't know where this was going and it had all been done for the sake to change the subject. Now he wasn't so sure.

Kiku knew Arthur better than anyone, perhaps better than the blond himself, and only he could tell he wasn't amused at all being put at the spot. Alice turned to face Arthur directly and grabbed his hands. "Is this true Artie?" she asked with her sweet voice. "Don't be getting any ideas silly girl," Arthur told her and placed her hands down to her lap, then patting her head. Alice pouted and Francis laughed, truly enjoying the scene. "And don't call me that."

* * *

><p>A loud bang made Kiku jump. Arthur had slammed his hand at the desk from his personal office and hand now begun to stride towards the bodyguard. Kiku stood just in front of the door as he had been summoned some moments ago. Two days had passed since the certain reunion and Arthur had to attend to business the following days. Now that the Briton had time on his hands, he wasted no time on contacting Kiku.<p>

"What the _bloody hell _was that about?" Arthur yelled. Kiku maintained his gaze on the floor and said nothing. "Answer me dammit!"

"I don't know what you are-"

"Don't you lie to me Kiku, don't you _dare_," Arthur hissed, pointing a finger at him.

"You know perfectly well what I am referring to. And if you need refreshing, I will gladly do so. Two previous nights, with Francis and Alice. Why did you tell her that?"

Kiku refrained from glancing at the emerald eyes.

"Look at me Kiku!" Arthur demanded, but Kiku only turned his head away. He heard him come closer to stand just in front of him, as a hand tightly gripped at his jawbone. Arthur violently forced Kiku to look at him in the eyes that now had fire burning in them. "You're hurting me, Arthur!" Kiku said as he pushed the hand away. "Then answer me you fool!" Arthur yelled.

"I was merely stating my thoughts. I still stand in my place, Alice is a nice person and pretty as well, so I was only suggesting-"

"You enjoy this don't you? You have reached so low Kiku," Arthur said, with a glare. There were so many emotions in those eyes: anger, sadness, disappointment. And they were all for Kiku.

"You are wrong, I have no bad intentions Arthur, I just wanted to…I wanted to…." Kiku replied hoarsely. The truth was, he did not even know his true motives, and Arthur's outburst did not make him feel any better. He felt a lump swell up his throat and he fought so hard for his voice not to crack. "I only meant to help you get closer to Alice, I know she will be good for you."

"Then I can only repeat myself. I have lost all my respect for you Kiku."

Arthur eyed him up and down in a fast motion as to show disgust. "Even when you know I loved you. Even when you knew I would fight for your love, you do this to me."

"Arthur, you don't understand, I…please don't leave…"

"No, I understand perfectly. You are a coward. You may be fearless at what you do, but when it comes to your values, everything is lost. I had offered to help make your dream come true, and you rejected me. I gave you my heart, and you threw it out the window," Arthur said.

"It's not like that…"

"I don't know you anymore…or perhaps I never did. As for me, I give up. You won in whatever game you were playing at. Good night."

And with that, Arthur walked out. Kiku's throat hurt so much that he could not help to let out sharp breaths. He rested his back on the wall and let himself slide down as he sobbed. Ashamed and forlorn, he simply could not take it any longer. Arthur had been right, he was a good for nothing coward that did not stand up for what he loved.

However, the blond did not truly comprehend the true reason why he could not be with him. And so he wept harder for feeling so trapped. _Can I really live like this forever? Be with the one I love, but not be able to truly love him?_

_No I can't._

With that, Kiku stopped crying at once. He knew he loved Arthur like no one else, more than himself. The Asian stood up with grace and wiped the tears with the thumb. He had found a new determination. Kiku only had one option and he was going to take it.

He knew Arthur had gone to bed already so he headed to his bedroom and opened it silently and just as noiselessly closed it with the key and slipped off his shoes. Arthur had been lying on his bed already and probably just fallen asleep, so Kiku gently sat beside him and pressed the back of his hand to the Britons' face. It did not take long before Arthur lifted his eyelids open and sat upright upon seeing the Japanese beside him. "Kiku, what are you…why are you here?"

Kiku leaned closer to Arthur and the blond hushed immediately.

"I never responded back did I? I love you too, Arthur," Kiku whispered, and pressed his lips to Arthur's. He let go and waited for Arthur's reaction. Surely enough, he grinned to Kiku. "You are not doing this because of what I said right? You are doing this on your own free will?"

"All on my own."

"I didn't do it to pressure you, if you are really doing it because I yelled at you then-"

Kiku hushed him with a kiss. "Let me prove it to you then," Kiku told him and began to unbutton Arthur's shirt.

* * *

><p><strong>Li Xiao Chun is Hong Kong. Govert is Netherlands.<strong>


	7. Chapter 6

In the dimness of the night, Kiku could only perceive Arthur's emerald eyes that the light of the moon reflected. In them, he could see millions of thoughts flowing one by one, understanding that Arthur was still trying to get a hand on the situation. Actually, Kiku was unsure where his actions were taking him as well, even if he knew in the back of his mind with firmness why. "Kiku, you don't have to prove me anything, at least not the way I think you want to," Arthur said, taking Kiku's busy hands away. "What are you afraid of?" Kiku asked.

Arthur stared at Kiku, perplexed. Soon after a smirk was followed as he recognized the same question he had asked the Japanese before, the day they had first kissed. "Time is short Arthur, and frankly, I don't see why we should waste it when we love each other," Kiku continued. "Honestly, I'm quite startled at your behavior. I never imagined you would be so outgoing," Arthur said. "I've always been outgoing, that's why I'm best at what I do as a bodyguard," Kiku responded.

"I meant at…this," Arthur said. Kiku had pushed him back and was already hovering over the blond to resume on the undoing of the shirt. His heart was beating hard against his chest, but like he had told Arthur, there was no time to waste. It was now or never. "Well, you did have a point. I have been running away for far too long now," Kiku said.

Arthur's green piercing eyes stared at the deep chocolate ones intently. "Even so, we don't have to do this if you are not ready. Even I think it's too soon," Arthur said. Kiku shook his head, no, and smiled sweetly at him.

"My mind is already set, Arthur."

"You are so stubborn, but I've always liked that about you. Even though it has maddened me more than one occasion," the blond said as he reached out to kiss the Asian. Kiku responded to the advancement, passionately savoring it. They released and shared a smile. With that simple gesture they knew that both wanted each other and could no longer be denied. "Then I apologize for having doing so," Kiku said.

"There's nothing to forgive," Arthur answered, all the while wrapping an arm over Kiku's shoulder and shifting the Asian below him. "Besides, you have always been there for me, that's all that matters. Oh, and whatever I told you back there I-"

Kiku placed and index finger on the Briton's lips. "It's okay, go ahead," he whispered.

Even then, Kiku had been able to read Arthur's state of mind, an ability he highly admired. Arthur did love the dark haired man as long as he could remember, but he had also been attracted to the man's mannerisms and beauty. He could never cease to admire the slender neck when Kiku wasn't watching, the chocolate eyes when he talked to him, and want the porcelain skin that glistened after he trained. And now that he could have him…the blond simply could not help to feel overwhelmed.

"Okay…," Arthur found himself say. Kiku's heart had begun to beat even faster at his own words by allowing the Briton to proceed. Their eyes locked and understood that there was no longer any going back. And so Arthur's restraint was lost as he kissed Kiku madly and the latter answered back just as strongly. The kissing felt different compared to the innocent first one they shared long ago. Being in bed and on top of each other somehow made it so much more pleasurable and both could simply not suppress their hunger.

Kiku embraced Arthur, yearning for his bodily heat, and he gripped at his hair, pulling him down, wanting no distance in between them. Arthur's hands were as busy, rummaging within Kiku's shirt and slipping off the suspenders. Their garments were simply in the way as the two craved to feel skin to skin. Meanwhile, their lips taunted each other, kissing and then retreating, making the other pursue. It was like a cat and mice game, until eventually the lips found each other again and rejoiced.

Tongues met and danced upon touch. Kiku had longed for the unique taste of tea that only Arthur could bring. Kiku allowed Arthur to take dominance being he who seemed to be the most skillful at it. Amongst the heated kisses, Kiku felt and ever growing bulge between him and Arthur as the blond thrust his hips against his own. Seeing as the slender man was becoming increasingly aroused, he let lips search for other sensitive skin areas. He lingered in the neckline, making Kiku incline his head back, and proceeded to nibble at the ear, all the while gripping at his thigh.

He remembered how strongly the Japanese had reacted in this area, and brushed his tongue in. Arthur got the reaction he had hoped for by the way Kiku began to squirm about and wrap his legs around the blonde's. Arthur smiled to himself and moved on down, down, and down, staying on the sensitive nipple momentarily, then to the abdomen and stopping on the lower section. Kiku could not help to hold his breath and lock his knees at the powerful sensation the rims of Arthur's mouth brought upon him. It felt intruding, but he knew it would bring pleasure as well if he had patience.

"Do you want me to take them of?" Kiku asked. He could not help but feel that someone else had used his voice at the sudden need to talk. Arthur looked up and smiled. "That's not quite…necessary," he answered. Kiku had already begun to sit up, but Arthur gently pushed him back.

"Arthur?"

The blond did not respond this time, instead answered by action. His head hovered between Kiku's legs and advanced to kiss there. At first Kiku did not understand why Arthur would do such a thing with his pants still on, but it became clear all too soon. He was taunting him. Even with the fabric in between his member and Arthur's lips, his face burned up at the teasing feeling it caused by any small movement.

"Arthur…you're torturing me. Is this the way to get back at me?" Kiku panted. "I could never do such a thing…Or do you just want me that badly?" Arthur purred. Kiku shoved a hand on Arthur's face.

"Idiot, I will not be made fun of," Kiku stated as he sat up and began to undo his belt. Arthur laughed at this, finding himself amused at the aggressive side he rarely saw of Kiku. In fact, he hadn't seen it since he and Alice mocked him at play in childhood. Kiku could only smile afterwards, while getting rid of the disturbing piece of clothing. At such intimacies, both found composure again and Kiku let himself be over taken by Arthur once more.

Arthur removed the last remaining layer of clothing from Kiku and their eyes met. A single nod told him to proceed. Arthur wasted no time, his mouth reached to Kiku's erection, licking and sucking there. Kiku let his head fall to the pillow at the new activity, finding it overwhelmingly pleasurable. Until then, he had been holding unnecessary moans, but this time the need to do so was unbearable.

He dug his toes on the bed sheets, his hands gripped the pillow tightly, and he squeezed his eyes shut. Arthur's tongue was clever as ever, knowing the most vulnerable spot and biting gently where he heard the Japanese moan the loudest. The said moans were turning Arthur on as well and the twisting body of the Japanese made his own need increase. He shifted his weight on his knees to sit up and slid his slacks off. He looked down on Kiku and searched for another approval, but instead saw the chocolate eyes lost somewhere else, in thought.

"Do you still want to go on? I won't do anything unless you want to," Arthur murmured. It seemed like ages to Arthur, but Kiku finally glanced back, eyes set with resolve.

"Kiku?"

In one swift movement, Arthur found himself below Kiku, the latter hovering over him.

It had all been too fast for him, his brain still calculating what had just happened. "I do want to," Kiku whispered, rather sensually to Arthur's ear. "But…_I _want to be the one in _you_."

A shiver ran down Arthur's spine and felt himself gulping hard; he had never heard him speak that way before.

Arthur lied still, momentarily, but annoyance took over. He thrashed about, kicking his legs to get Kiku off, all in vain of course since the Asian had his hands pinned down firmly. Misjudging the Asian's strength was easy to do for being such a petite man, but it was a grave mistake. He was an elite bodyguard after all.

"Let me go, what is this about! You just want to get back at _me _don't you!" he hissed. Kiku could only chuckle.

_This must be degrading to him, he still has his masculinity after all, _the Asian thought. No matter, as long as he would love to be treated by Arthur, he had his reasons… "Fine, I'm sorry, I didn't want to upset you that much," Arthur said. "Oh, that wasn't it!" Kiku replied quickly.

Arthur twisted his mouth, skeptical. "I can't blame you if you are still mad at me," he said. Arthur wore the most sincere expression Kiku had ever seen, and so a smile formed in his lips. "Trust me, it's not that, forget it, it's nothing," Kiku assured him. Things cleared, the two ensued in their love making.

Their lips clashed once more, having missed their presence. Arthur's fingers trailed Kiku's back and another hand wrapped itself round his neck, in turn, the dark haired man began to slip off the blonde's undergarment. Now there was nothing in the way and their warmth could be transmitted directly. Kiku could simply not stand the heat between them anymore and the throbbing in his member was begging for attention as well. His lips departed from Arthur's and stared down at him.

The blond stared back, passion in his eyes. Such emerald piercing eyes intimidated the Japanese and could not help to close his. He hated to admit it, but he was scared. With one huge breath, he parted Arthur's knees apart with his own and leaned his hips closer. "W-wait Kiku!" Arthur exclaimed. Surely enough, Arthur's sudden outburst made him jump.

"Am I doing something wrong?" Kiku asked, cursing himself mentally if he had. "No it's not you! It's just that, you just can't, well you can...but it's better if you…you have to…"Arthur stuttered.

Arthur saw the confused and somewhat nervous eyes of the Japanese and he knew that he was not making anything better at all. "Here, just give me your hand," Arthur said. Kiku did just so and Arthur cupped it with his own, taking it to his lips. He sucked on the first three fingers and licked them, wetting them thoroughly. Kiku found himself humming; Arthur's tongue felt so good no matter where he licked.

Arthur returned the hand and looked up to Kiku, whose face had turned bright red. He could not help but feel proud at being able to bring pleasure to the Asian so easily. But his self-confidence disappeared right away at what about he was going to tell him to do. "You have to reach in and make space for the real thing," Arthur said, rather difficultly. Oh, how much easier it would had been if the Japanese hadn't persisted on topping.

Kiku perceived Arthur's uncomfortableness right away. He felt rather awkward himself at this request, but understood that what bothered Arthur was beyond that. Knowing Arthur better than anyone, he knew the blond was a man of pride. His feelings of being degraded to bottoming hadn't quite disappeared yet, but one thing did puzzle him. Kiku wondered why Arthur knew so much in detail and him so little, even when being older than the blond.

Nonetheless, no matter how much he thought about it, he was grateful at least one of them knew what happened next. And so Kiku took in Arthur's word and inserted an index finger at Arthur's opening and did just as instructed. Arthur fidgeted uneasy at the new sensation within him, but as Kiku introduced new digits, waves of pleasure shot up from his backend, his face flushing and forgetting all pride. He pulled Kiku down to his level by cupping his face and his tongue reached out to his mouth, rummaging inside. Their hips rocked back and forth in a perfect rhythm, their lips widening more to allow access for further touch, and Arthur's fingers stroked the Asian's dark hair; Kiku simply could not take it no more.

Without any second thoughts, Kiku extracted his fingers and replaced it with his own length, sliding it carefully inside Arthur's dampness. Arthur immediately parted from Kiku's mouth, howling in pain as tears escaped from his eyes. The Japanese froze, "Arthur, are you okay?"

Kiku's natural bodyguard senses told him to stop completely, and appease the hurting Arthur. He began to move out, but the blond shook his head, no.

"Its supposed to hurt, don't worry about me, just…keep going," Arthur groaned. Kiku simply nodded, and advanced once more, not finding it difficult as his body ached to do so anyways. He fought wholeheartedly not to stop thrusting at the sound of Arthur's muffled cries, but his burning desire told him to push more and more. His vision was almost a blur and his head felt like it would explode; a whole new level of pleasure took over his body that he had never felt before.

It just was too much to feel Arthur be so tight round his length and his cries had soon turned to low moans. Kiku held him closer, and so did Arthur, digging his nails on the Asian's shoulder blades. In no little time, both moaned loudly at their momentum, panting heavily, thrusting at each other with rhythm. When Kiku pushed, Arthur returned the force with even more strength. Kiku had to hold him in position by the wrists to anchor him as the blond had begun to writhe underneath him.

Moisture traveled down Kiku's nose and dripped at the constant movement both produced. Kiku's hair was wet as well, glued securely at his skin. He was not the type to sweat so easily, but among the steamy craze, he was showered in perspiration.

"K-Kiku…" Arthur breathed out. Such harmonious voice calling to him, it drove Kiku mad. Arthur's face was contorted in pleasure and him voicing his name so sensually, it simply was the last straw. In a climatic effort, Kiku reached down and trapped the rims of Arthur's mouth with his own and shared wet, sloppy kisses. Arthur was the first to reach his climax as he released white fluid to the air, and moaned deeply in Kiku's mouth.

"Arthur..." Kiku mouthed between Arthur's trembling lips, his body shaking, and came soon after. He let himself drop on Arthur's chest and panted heavily. His head elevated up and down at Arthur's heavy breathing and found himself relaxing in such steady movements. Arthur fondled Kiku's damp hair and smiled upon him. "That was great Kiku…," he breathed out.

Kiku's own chest swelled up, pride taking over him. He flipped himself to be side-by-side to Arthur and pressed his brow against him. Their noses gently touched and their lips kissed ever so softly. Their separation could not be withstood after sharing such intimacies, and so they locked arms, embracing warmly. However, being close as they were, they were no longer in motion, so Kiku could not help a shiver.

"Are you cold?" Arthur whispered. "I'm fine," Kiku answered, but Arthur had already gotten up. Perhaps it could not be helped, they were completely naked after all and their perspiration caught the slightest breeze in the room. And so Arthur brought a sleeping robe for Kiku and himself. Once placing them on, they wasted no time holding to one another again.

Arthur had dreamt of this for far too long now. He could not help feel blissful by having the love of life beside him in bed. He had always being a romanticist, and the simple act of cuddling like this brought warmth in his heart, and not the fact of just having made love to him either. Of course that too made him happy. Also, perhaps being the fairy-tale lover he was made him that way, as images began to appear in his mind.

He pictured himself waking everyday with the Japanese beside him, like this, opening his eyes to the chocolate eyes already smiling at him. That very same thought made him wish it was morning already to actually have that experience first-hand. Other images kept on unraveling: spending leisure time with the Asian more often without him having to worry for hidden bombs or surprise attacks. Kiku just being himself, not a bodyguard. Kiku being his long life partner.

He quivered in excitement, not able to control himself. Kiku had his face buried on Arthur's chest, so he looked up to the emerald eyes at the sudden movement. "I'm going to make you the happiest man on earth," Arthur stated. Kiku raised an eyebrow at this, somewhat amused. "Remember my debt to you?" the blond asked.

Kiku pecked his lips, "Oh that. I told you, it was my…duty."

Kiku immediately glanced down, knowing Arthur hated him reminding him of that fact. But Arthur had cupped his chin and brought his glance back to his. "You saved my life, at least, allow me to save yours."

Kiku stared, not blinking at all.

He gulped and said, "What do you mean?"

"Just as I said, I will make you happy. I want you to live _your _life. If I want you to be with me, I want it to be shared, not mine completely taken over yours. What I mean is, I don't want you as my bodyguard."

"Arthur…"

"I want you by my side, but as my long-life partner."

Kiku buried his face once more on Arthur's chest to hide tears, but he could feel the wetness on Kiku's eyes anyways. "Please don't cry love," Arthur said, tightening his hold on the Asian. But Kiku kept on sobbing, not able to help himself. All Arthur could do was pet the jet black hair and whisper softly in his ear, making hushing noises.

"Arthur?" Kiku said once finding his voice.

"Yes, love?"

"I just want you to know, that I will _always _love you. No matter what happens, you will always be my true love," Kiku said, firmly. Arthur chuckled, and nudged his nose with the Japanese's.

"I know that already."

After whispering sweet nothings to each other, both fell asleep in their embrace. But Kiku could not afford to sleep all the way until the morning like Arthur had planned…so his lids swung open later at night. Arthur's complexion was already relaxed, fully asleep. He stared at his eyebrows, chuckling lowly at how much he loved them no matter their dimension. His eyes trailed down to Arthur's other facial features as well.

He admired every aspect of him, the lips that were slightly drifted apart as soft breath came in and out from them. Not so long ago they had been kissing his body passionately, treating him like a masterpiece. When he thought he had lingered enough, he took out his arm that had been secured below Arthur with the outmost carefulness. Avoiding waking him up was top priority. He began to search for his layer of clothes that were scattered randomly on the floor and put them on.

Once that task was completed, he glanced at the perfect sleeping figure in the bed. Arthur's chest lifted up and down steadily; a hint of a smile could be seen in the gentle face. Kiku fought hard an inner battle to tear his gaze from his one true love, and to face the door. If he lingered, he was afraid he would have second thoughts. He took in one huge breath, maybe not to cry again, and opened it. By getting out that door, he left Arthur's life.

* * *

><p>Arthur awoke by the thin rays of sunlight that escaped from the curtains. He was facing the ceiling, and so he turned around to face his love. He rubbed one eye with his knuckles as he sat up. He had wanted to say "good morning" to Kiku, but apparently he had already gotten up. He was rather disappointed too; he had hoped after confessing his true feelings to Kiku, he would have understood not to go back to attend to his bodyguard duties in the morning. <em>What a pity, but there's always other mornings to come, <em>he thought, as he relived the memories of their love making from some hours ago.

He could not help to smile, it had seemed so surreal now that morning had come. He had to put himself together any who, being that he had business to take care of anyways. He wished the morning could have been shared with Kiku, but it could not be helped. So he went to the shower, bathed and got groomed and dressed, and went down to the main kitchen. His heart dropped again as he did not see the Japanese there either, but the tea had being made.

Arthur sighed heavily, and sat down to drink his tea alone. He drank with patience, read the newspaper, and even then Kiku did not appear. He checked his wrist watch; it was five past 10. Peter had already gone down to the kitchen as well. Their father and his stepmother weren't currently on the household, so he prepared him breakfast before leaving to business.

Arthur went outside to the parking structure to find the limo missing. "Where the bloody hell is everyone this morning?" he yelled. He had to wait another hour to see the car. Of course he did not have a schedule to tend to being the superior he was, but not having control of the situation did vex him greatly. Vash stepped out and seemed startled upon seeing the blonde's irritated face.

"Mr. Arthur, you were not informed?" he asked. "Informed of what!" he responded, losing all of his temper. Vash's mouth shut tightly at this. "Then I cannot tell you."

"What is this about? Where were you anyways?"

He saw his father step out as well, followed by his wife, and an envelope at hand.

"Looks like we are in danger, son," he said, giving the said envelope to Arthur. He searched for an answer in his father's face, but found none. He wasn't good at that like Kiku was. "Why did you come earlier as expected? "Arthur persisted.

Still no answer, so he had no choice to investigate from his only clue. He opened the envelope, unfolded the letter and saw official print along with the bodyguard agency's stamp on the bottom. His eyes trailed back and forth, only picking up certain words, as his blood went cold. "What…what do you mean Kiku had to leave?" Arthur said, slowly.

"Your life was in danger, along with the whole family. The agency gave him permission to abandon the job. It was all legal. A bodyguard's testimony is enough if it means to save lives," Vash said, his eyes on the floor. Arthur stared at the Swiss, incredulous.

"How was our life in danger?" Arthur asked, not sure how to feel at this. "I found nothing on this paper about it!"

"That's the thing, discreetness must be taken upon at such delicate situations," Vash told the Kirklands, but not quite facing Arthur. "Bullshit!" the blond shouted, now feeling outright furious. "He didn't say anything about…"

All eyes were on him. "Arthur, what's wrong with you?" he heard his father ask. He felt cold sweat run down his temple, as dreams were shattered into pieces. _You left me..._

_You left me…_

_Why!_

_Even after we…_

He had already planned a whole life with him. He had confessed this feelings. And to leave without a warning...

_You are a coward after all._

Anger and disappointment, sad and betrayed, it was just too much emotions to handle. He could not help to laugh. But inside he cried.

* * *

><p>Within a month, Arthur gathered the best investigators on the country. He paid thousands to them so they could find Kiku, but to no avail. They insisted that the Agency protected all information about him.<p>

Another month passed and he fell into depression, ensued by alcoholism. His temper was easy to snap and became intolerable to anyone who spoke to him.

It didn't take long for his depression over Kiku turn to resentment. Just the mere mention of his name would infuriate him.

"So is Kiku coming back?" Peter asked.

"I told you to never mention _that _name in my presence!" Arthur barked. Peter cried. He cursed at his brother and told him that "at least he kissed me goodbye".

_He didn't even tell me goodbye…_

More months passed by and Arthur's father could no longer withstand his son's behavior. He contacted Francis Bonnefoy and the French soon came to visit Arthur often.

The French always found the Briton drunk or a mess.

"You're hardly recognizable! I told you once that wine could take a man's worries away, but to never abuse its power," Francis scolded him.

"Why did he leave me?" Arthur cried, standing up clumsily from his seat. "He used me. That's what he did. He knew my feelings, got what he wanted, and left."

"I thought he wasn't the type. That he was always there when no one wasn't."

"You are not making this better," Arthur said, a menacing look in his eyes.

"Nothing will, not in your state. But there is something else that can also take a man's worries away…"

"Tell me. I hate myself from bringing myself like this for a man I learned to loathe."

Francis took his time to answer.

"A woman's presence."

Arthur searched for Alice. He visited her household. He became attached to her once more.

More months passed. An investigator who had been persistent visited.

"That was a challenge of a life time. I had never been outwitted like that; it was almost like a game! I simply had to win. But as soon as I found him, I learned that it was _he _that let himself be caught."

Arthur had been in his office, listening intently, but at the mention of Kiku, all interest was lost.

"He was some sort of spy? Anyways, he gave me this," the investigator placed a large yellow envelope in Arthur's desk, "But disappeared completely afterwards."

The investigator was paid, but the yellow envelope disregarded. Arthur was about to throw it to the trash, but stopped. He did not what to see the contents, he did not want to know anything about the Asian _at all, _but decided to lock it away instead.

Even more time passed. Arthur was able to let go and forget completely of the said envelope.

Perhaps it is true, time does heal all wounds.

Kiku Honda became just a blurry memory.

_to be continued..._


	8. Chapter 7

_4 Years Later_

Arthur Kirkland sat at his office. It was evening, so the light was limited, yet he didn't want to turn on his lamp just yet. He was reading graphs and writing numbers, the usual of always, along with the company of tea. Needless to say, his desk was covered with documents and pens scattered about. For a long period of time, that's what his evening had been consisting of, not bothering for any social parties, and only taking care of business.

He took a sip of tea; it had already gone cold. He sighed, got up, and called the maid to bring him more. Arthur sat once more, but without tea to entertain him while working with data, it was difficult to keep his mind out of a certain "nightmare" he had the past night. The giggling of the children from his memory still rang in his head and no matter how hard he fought to fight their riling voices, they only got louder and louder.

"_Shhh! He'll hear us!" the dark haired boy giggled._

"_You are telling me to hush? Just listen to you!" the blond one whispered, but couldn't help to laugh as well._

_The dark haired one kept on giggling, but covered the other's mouth._

The maid brought him new tea, Arthur excused her, and busied his mind on the tea's flavor as he drank. It wasn't enough.

_The two boys embraced each other as the door slid open to their hiding spot._

"_Aiyaaa! Some bodyguard you are!"_

"_Hiding from your studies aren't you?"_

"_But daaaaad, me and Kiku are tired of learning things we are never going to use!"_

_The dark haired boy couldn't suppress a snort. As contagious as it was, the blond boy burst out laughing as well._

"_Alright, just for today. If you are going to play, might as well go outside too."_

_The two boys' eyes shone as they shared glances, and sprinted away from the wardrobe, grasping hands._

"_But Master…"_

"_Don't worry Yao, they are children after all…"_

_The laughter of children echoed across the household._

"Can't I just have some peace and quiet for once?"

Blue eyes stared back at him, puzzled and somewhat teary.

"If you want I can come another time…"

"No, Alfred, stay! Here, you can sit beside me."

"Yay!"

The dirty-blond boy ran to Arthur's lap. "Are you ready for today's story?" Arthur asked, beaming at the boy. Alfred groaned, "It's not another of those silly fairy tales, right?"

Arthur gaped at him. "What's wrong with them now? You used to love them!"

Alfred giggled and almost lost balance at his seating. Arthur had to hold him back up. "Well are you going to tell me?"

Before the young boy had time to answer, two knocks was heard at the door. "Come in," Arthur said, irritation in his voice.

The maid did so. "Mr. Zwingli wants to speak to you," she said. Arthur sighed in exasperation as Alfred looked up to see what the matter was. He smirked at Alfred. "I guess he wants to beg for his job, huh?" Arthur told him, and the boy couldn't help to smile mischievously as well.

"All right, let him in. Alfred, go help your mum or something. Story time can wait."

Alfred leapt down from Arthur's lap, disappointed at first, but as energetic as the boy was, he bounced away laughing with joy. The maid followed Alfred, and soon after in walked the Swiss.

Arthur let his head rest under intertwined fingers, his weight supported on the elbows. The smirk was still displayed at his face, but as Vash had entered, it had expanded even more at one side. "Take a sit," Arthur ordered. Vash did not oblige. "I want this to be fast," the Swiss replied, strolling across the room, rummaging through a jacket pocket.

"In that case, you can start leaving tomorrow," Arthur said, eyes squinting at the defiance. "Not to worry, I have all my things packed and ready to go," Vash said. He took out a card, text visible on it, and placed it on Arthur's desk. "What is this?" the Briton demanded, not bothering to read it himself.

"Kiku's location," Vash answered, almost matter-of-factly.

Arthur's blood went cold. "You have the audacity to mention _that_ name? Just because I am firing you, it doesn't mean you can do as you please in my own home!" Arthur voiced at top of his lungs, already getting up from his seat. Apparently it wasn't enough that he had to be tortured with the evil dream he had earlier, and now the Swiss had to revive a deeper anger within him. Even his nostrils had begun to flare.

"It looks like I will have to sit," Vash said, "I have a feeling you won't use that piece of information I fought so hard to get. You don't even know how much strings I had to pull."

Arthur glared at Vash, who had already proceeded to comfortably sit. "Get out," Arthur uttered lowly and menacing.

The Swiss glared back as darkly. The Briton had been trying to fire him several times before, but the head Kirkland refused to let Vash go, not seeing the logic to do so when he was so good at what he did. In fact, Arthur had been firing bodyguards that his father hired, but so far only Vash had preserved. Now that Arthur had control over the whole family rights and fortune, he could do as he pleased, and one of the first things on his list was to dismiss the Swiss. For Vash, aiding Arthur was the last thing on his mind, not that he resented him either, but his attitude towards the staff was also intolerable.

But Vash had reasons to do so anyways, reasons that motivated him to disobey a direct order. "Hear me out," Vash continued, "Please, I know this topic isn't necessarily easy for you but…"

"Fine, spit it out already," Arthur snapped, as he sat down again. Vash took in a deep breath; what he was going to confess wasn't going to be easy at all.

"I don't tell this story just to anyone. You are the second exception," Vash began. Arthur made a loud sigh, establishing his indifference. But the Swiss persisted. "The first person was Kiku…"

Another nerve was stricken at the mention of the forbidden name, but Arthur somehow found the patience for the Swiss to press on. "Just get to the point will you?" Arthur said. "Very well. Just understand that this isn't easy for me either, as it isn't easy for you," Vash responded. Arthur placed a hand on his temple, but simply nodded.

"I never forgave myself the day Kiku left. I know I influenced somehow his reasons for doing so, even when he quit months after telling him my story."

Arthur wore a bore look, but Vash was not discouraged to stop. "You see…I think I frightened him or fed a fear he had already kept inside. That story, well, I frankly don't want to tell it as detailed as I did to him. And I promise I will get to the point as fast as you wish.

"Anyways, so before working under your service, I belonged to the Vogel family. I was assigned to be the human shield for Elise Vogel. You can say I was in a similar situation with you and Kiku. We grew up together. Eventually, I began to call her my… _schwester._

"Without meaning to, we became family and couldn't be without the other."

Vash smiled at this, staring at the window. Arthur cleared his throat, forcing the other to continue, so he nodded and went on, "Little did I know, I had begun to love her more than my own life.

"That is a bodyguard's gravest, mistake. Instead of focusing on my duties, I desired nothing more to be with her. Make her smile so it could make me whole. These selfish feelings clouded my judgment and so then…"

Vash broke off, no longer able to find his voice.

By then he had captured Arthur's full attention and had been listening attentively to the part of the "bodyguard's gravest, mistake".

"Well, go on!" he urged. But the Swiss had his head low, strands of pale, blond hair covering his eyes. Arthur clicked his tongue, his patience running out once more, but this time wanting to hear out from Vash. He had never heard of this bodyguard rule.

When he did look up, Vash had crystalized eyes, a tear already sliding down a cheek. Arthur flinched; he had never seen the man at this state, even less expressing any emotion, if at all. "Oh, my lovely Elise...," Vash wept. Arthur did not know how to react at Vash's unexpected outburst, but he had to know…

"Take your time mate, but please do continue."

"They…It was _my _entire fault. And she never blamed me. No one did goddammit!" Vash shouted. "What was?" Arthur whispered, now feeling sorry for the man. Vash swiped an eye roughly, and stopped sobbing at once, gaining some composure.

"No one blamed me because I was captured instead of Elise. They said it was the heroic thing to do…but Elise, she had a mind of her own and a strong will as well. It was undeniable, she loved me as strongly as I loved her. And so she gave in to the abductor's demands, just so they could let me go," Vash said in between gasps. "But of course they had other things in mind…"

Arthur gulped as he felt the atmosphere of the room become ominous, but longed to hear more nonetheless. The human mind can be so attentive when it comes to tragedy. Vash breathed in sharply, holding in powerful urges to burst out crying again. "You don't have to tell me in detail remember?" Arthur reminded. Vash nodded and smiled sadly, and took another huge breath.

"They…They did despicable _things _to her, and I was forced to watch! Hearing her cry in pain while I could do nothing about it! The bastards…!" Vash yelled, while slamming his fist on the desk. Arthur was already engrossed at where the story was going and didn't even mind the abuse the desk was enduring at the moment. "They _knew _she and I were more than the apparent. That I was more than a bodyguard; that is the _ultimate_flaw!"

Arthur stared wide eyed, finally understanding. "You mean, they used you?"

"Exactly. They knew we loved each other, and they used that fact against us. They knew Elise would do _anything _to save me, and that's how they got to her."

Arthur hadn't realized how fast he had been breathing or the cold sweat that ran down his temple. "So you see, I made two mistakes: My love for Elise made me let my guard down. Because I let my guard down, I let myself be captured, and so Elise had to suffer the consequences for it," Vash continued. "You told all of this to Kiku I presume?" Arthur asked.

"And more."

Arthur let himself sink at his seat, feeling unsettled every second that passed. Vash eyed him carefully, deciding his next words carefully.

"He loved you didn't he?"

Arthur looked up to the now stern Swiss. His stomach had been churning and his head felt overwhelmingly dizzy, but he had to answer.

"I believe so, and I in return did too."

He felt like a heavy weight lifted from his chest, but at the same time, felt oddly melancholic. "I strongly thought so. Yes, that was it, whatever went on between you two, I believe Kiku felt my story was going to repeat itself with you. That is why I blame myself."

Arthur collected his thoughts that had been swarming his mind uncontrollably at the sudden revelations. So many questions flooded in as well, wanting to be answered. "Are you saying Kiku left because he feared for my life? And why do you blame yourself after warning him not to make your same mistake? What _did _happen to Elise?"

Vash glanced at the window once more, the sunrays having disappeared completely by this time. Arthur had just noticed this and the only light that had been illuminating them for a while now was from the moon and stars, and so he lit his lamp. "There's no other reason I see; Kiku truly feared they would use him to get to you. Especially with Braginski on your trail. However, I do believe he already knew love could hinder the job of a bodyguard before, of course, not as strongly as before telling him my story," Vash said.

Arthur nodded at this and added, "It does make sense, especially when he avoided me so fervently several times in our past. He didn't want to become attached for that rule did he?"

"Correct," Vash replied. Arthur shut his eyelids and covered his face with his hands at this, slightly rubbing his eyes.

"As for Elise, she's alive if that's what you meant. After the 'incident', she simply wasn't the same anymore. She became mute to everyone else, except to me… She kept on repeating how happy she was because nothing serious had happened to me," Vash said, his voice cracking again. "And I couldn't take it any longer, the guilt ate me alive, so I quit."

Arthur opened his eyes to meet with the Swiss'. "I ran away in other words. I regret it to this very moment, which is why I blame myself for Kiku doing the same. I wanted him to learn from my experience and prevent it, but never to quit," Vash said. With that, every puzzle piece was completed, and Arthur enlightened.

Arthur picked up the card and read it. "So this address is where he currently resides?"

"Ah yes, that information. Believe me, it took all my power in my hands to get it, and even then I couldn't do it by myself. It took me so long because he had been travelling across the seas," Vash answered.

"But he is currently staying in Italy as it says here, right? He is not going anywhere any time soon?"

"Let's hope not. As for me, I've done everything I can so you can find him, use that information wisely. I will go gather my belongings now and leave as soon as possible," Vash said, already getting up.

Arthur sprang to his feet. "W-wait, you don't have to leave or anything, really. I apologize for everything, I was just, I was just…I was being an idiot alright? You don't have to work for me anymore if that's alright to you, but I could suggest you to another family!"

Vash smiled and said, "I wanted to leave anyways. I've been running away for too long now. I'm going to…I'm going to go see my _schwester, _my beloved Elise."

Arthur wanted to say anything, but was left speechless, and could only accept the handshake that the Swiss was now offering. Vash bid him farewell, and wished him luck, and with that, the Swiss left.

Arthur let himself sink at his seat once more. Surely enough, Alfred had been informed of the Swiss' departure and returned to his father gleefully. "Story time, story time!" he squealed. Alfred returned to his rightful place at Arthur's lap and opened the fairy tale book.

"Even if it's from this…I want you to read it to me!" he exclaimed.

"Okay."

Of course the young child hadn't noticed the pale complexion of the Briton, or the shakiness of his voice. A trembling hand flipped over the pages and Alfred stopped it at the drawing of a dragon.

"This one is alright I guess, it has a hero!" Alfred said, jumping up and down. And so Arthur read:

_"There was once a kingdom with a beautiful princess. The whole kingdom loved her. Her beauty was not what won their heart however, but her fair rule. But one day, a dragon kidnapped her. The people of her kingdom did everything in their power to retrieve her, but to no avail._

_It was until a knight in shining armor came to the kingdom after hearing the stories of the pleading citizens who longed for their fair lady back. Surely enough, he took on the quest and travelled far and wide to retrieve her. The knight's persistence prevailed and he found the dragon's lair and slayed the dragon. The knight rescued the princess and returned her to the kingdom. Her people celebrated and wanted him as their king, and the princess, grateful at the knight, wished for the same._

_But the knight had already left, continuing his righteous journey to bring justice. The princess and her kingdom never forgot that knight and swore to make his name immortal. The End."_

"But that doesn't make sense," Alfred whined. "In the comic books, the hero always gets the girl! Why can't the knight just marry the princess and save the day at the same time?"

"If the knight marries the princess, who will be in charge of protecting her then..." Arthur murmured, restating the same words his older brother told him so long ago. "Boo, that's so meaningless!" Alfred whined.

"Go to sleep now won't you?" Arthur whispered. Alfred protested, loudly as ever, but left the office, not before kissing his father good night. As soon as the boy was out of sight, Arthur immediately rummaged through a drawer, retrieved his master key, and began to unlock all the storage compartments. Papers flew everywhere, even the business papers he had been working on were thrown about. His heart was drumming hard against his chest, fearful that he would not find the large, yellow envelope.

He felt hours had passed and felt he was going to go mad, but his heart stopped at the sight of the said envelope. It could have contained anything ...And he had never bothered to open it after so many years.

_"Time is short Arthur, and frankly, I don't see why we should waste it when we love each other."_

Arthur gulped at the sudden memory. By this time, his hand shook uncontrollably, finding it difficult to open it. So instead, he tore it apart and let the contents fall to his hands impatiently.

They were photos. There was a paper attached as well, written in permanent marker with a hand writing he could recognize anywhere. It read in huge, bold letters:

**FOLLOWING MY DREAM**

Arthur read it a thousand times, trying to decipher a non-existent hidden message.

It simply was what it was. Finally deciding to flip the paper over, he viewed the images of the photos, taking them in slowly. They were all nature photos. They were Kiku's nature photos.

He placed them down on the desk, sat down, hunched over, and cried.

"_What is this time of hour to call?" a drained voice said._

"_Francis, quickly set up everything so when I get there your private airplane is ready. I'll be there in the morning, no later than 8!"_

"_What are you going about?"_

"_I need your private airplane to go to Italy!"_

"_Quoi? Are you crazy? Are you aware what time of night it is right now?"_

"_I'm fully sane, this is an emergency."_

"…"

"_Are you there?"_

"_I just don't understand why you depend on me for my private airplane when you clearly shower in money. It must be you admitting I have the best quality of services."_

"_Shut up Francis. You know I won't purchase one ever since my father's business with Braginski years ago. I won't risk my neck to place my information so easily where the Russian is active the most. So I'll be there, you hear me?"_

"_Very well…I'll have everything ready for you."_

Francis had done as he was told, didn't question the Briton and was able to depart as soon as he had arrived to the airport. In just several hours, Arthur had arrived to Italy and was already boarding a cab on Venice. Even after with the speed of the modern transportation, Arthur felt he was many years behind his destination. Any tourist in the legendary city of canals would had been elated, but not Arthur Kirkland. His heart beat rapidly in premonition, and even fear. He had arrived to Francis' place in his everyday garments, even without any luggage, except for his passport, so Francis had to dress him up properly and make him a suitcase with extra clothing.

Arthur had seen it trivial even back then and now, nothing like that mattered in his situation. When the cab stopped at a town square, he paid the driver, and walked among the crowded place. A gondola had to take him to the _Palazzo Barbarigo _hotel, and by then it had already become evening. He paid for a room, and immediately took out the written card that Vash had made for him. It had the room's number and everything, he did not have to ask for it. He loved that Swiss.

It was wisely done so since such information would have never been given to him, not even when private investigators couldn't before. His blood was pumping and had the urge to run, but he still was a gentleman and had to show dignity. But as the elevator had reached the certain floor and the numbers got closer to his destination, he simply could not take it any longer. His gentleman code could go to hell! The Briton began to sprint, heads turning to watch the mad man run at such a luxurious place.

He must be an American, they thought, no manners. Any Briton would have been infuriated at such comparison, but Arthur ran even faster and faster, not glancing back at the people with sneers. And at last, the number at the door matched the number at the card he clutched with his life. He disregarded thoughts that told him _he_ currently wasn't present, or worse, someone else had moved in. Nonetheless, that wasn't stopping him now.

He lifted a hand and pressed the doorbell with and index finger. His heart hurt against his chest at the new speed it was hammering at, and even adrenaline had been activated. In seemed ages to Arthur, but he finally heard the door handle move for the door to open. He met Asian eyes and time stopped.

"How may I help you…?"

Beautiful midnight eyes widened and hands reached out to pull him in.

The dark haired man locked the room with every key and commenced to close all curtains in the room. Meanwhile, the Briton stood stupefied and speechless. He had a whole speech planned already, but at the moment his mind was blank. His eyes could only follow the constant movements of the dark haired man to make the room invisible. In a final desperation, he was able to find his tongue and utter the man's name.

"Kiku…"

The Asian glanced from behind his shoulder, and turned to face the Briton directly. "How did you find me?" he asked. "Vash, he told me. He told me everything," Arthur whispered. Kiku's slender eyebrows knitted in confusion, but motioned Arthur to sit. Arthur sat at the nearest sofa, realizing how his legs were throbbing to rest.

Kiku stood in front of him. He was dressed in his casual kimono, a garment he had only seen in their childhood. "I do not understand…Anyways, you cannot be seen with me. I will ask you to leave," Kiku said, but Arthur could see the pain in his eyes as he did so.

But this time, a million speeches returned to Arthur, and leapt up from where he sat, and embraced the Japanese. "I'm not leaving you now that I found you, fool!" he exclaimed, holding him tighter. He was glad Kiku did not fight back, but did not return the gesture either. "What did Vash exactly tell you?" he heard Kiku say.

"He told me to find you here. He told me the truth; he told me why you left."

Arthur felt Kiku move out, but gently. "I still don't understand…"

"Kiku, _please, _don't play dumb. I know I should have searched for you even without Vash telling me what he did. I failed you, so I beg of you, just listen to what I have to say."

"There is nothing to say Arthur. And I beg of _you_, please leave before they find out you are with me."

Arthur pulled Kiku closer to him again. "No! I'm not letting you go anymore. I lost you once, and I'm not allowing it again. I know the truth now, and I will fight for you like I should had years ago!"

It took a while, but Kiku finally returned the embrace. "What did Vash exactly tell you?" Kiku murmured. "About being a bodyguard, about love being forbidden, about Elise…"

He felt the Asian stiffen, and move away once again. But he kept close, just a breath away.

"Arthur, this fact doesn't change anything. You still can't be around me, you still can't-"

"All this time you were looking over my security. I feel like an idiot for having overlooking it! I blamed you when all you were doing was trying to protect me."

"Yes Arthur, that is true but I-"

"The day you left, it broke my heart to million pieces. Anger and resentment took over me, and I was blinded by it. A wise man would have searched for you without rest, but I gave up immediately. But I always loved you,_always. _I just channeled those feelings over you to hate; I honestly thought you had ran away and I would never see you again."

Kiku was listening intently, but frowned. "You sent me those photos, you really followed your dream didn't you?" Arthur said, changing the topic almost completely. Kiku was dumbfounded for a moment, but his lips turned to a small smile. "If you sent them to me, it must have meant for me to search for you, and I didn't even glance at them for so many years…"

Kiku shook his head and said, "No Arthur. I just wanted to let you know that I was not a coward. I know you did believe that after leaving like that, so I at least wanted to prove you otherwise."

Both decided to sit, Kiku had already forgotten he had wanted Arthur to leave and went on with their conversation. Arthur looked down, sadness at his eyes.

"I was the coward all along, I just kept blaming you. I was a coward for not opening that envelope, for believing for so many years you had just used me."

"Why would I ever use you?" Kiku asked, not helping to chuckle. Arthur took a moment to reply, then laughed himself. "Because I'm charming and desired by all women?"

"You are so full of yourself!" Kiku said, pushing him friendly at the shoulder. Once the two gained composure once again, they shared one warm gaze. "I'm so happy for you, for following your dream. How is it going anyways? Are you still a bodyguard?" Arthur asked, eager for the answer.

"Yes I am, and yes it is going well. I'm still an amateur, but I knew some people in the Agency that were able to connect me to some references. That really helped me with my new career I'm fighting to obtain. But I am still a bodyguard, and matter of fact, I'm here in Italy for that reason," Kiku replied. "So that means I'm still placing you in danger if that was what you were thinking about."

Arthur gave it a thought, and then said, "Wait, so how are you being a bodyguard and a photographer at the same time?"

Kiku let his back completely incline on the sofa, and smiled. "The Agency gave me a break…"

He had a mischievous grin at his face now and Arthur couldn't help to laugh. "Yao doesn't know does he?"

Kiku blushed and nodded.

Arthur kept on laughing, now placing a hand at his stomach. Kiku had really stepped it up for his dream. And so the Asian couldn't help to laugh himself and both let their heads fall back. Going against Yao was their ultimate daring game of childhood and such risks amused them to no end. Apparently even now as grown men.

"But I will tell him one day. He is dying you know…" Kiku said, calm at once. Arthur focused as well, and placed a hand over the Japanese's ones at the mention of his brother's health. "I saw him cough blood more than one occasion when I was younger. I can only imagine how much worse his condition has declined," Arthur said, gently.

Kiku simply nodded, but set his gaze down. "Kiku…I can gather the best doctors of whole Europe so they can make him better," Arthur said. "No Arthur, it's too late. The best of my country did the same, and even expanded his health, but they assured it was terminal. Besides, you can't do anything related with me!"

At this, Kiku snatched his hand from Arthur and stood up. "Didn't you learn anything from Elise's story? I would believe after what Vash told you that he would prevent you from searching for me," Kiku alleged. "You would assume wrong. Actually he told me himself that he believed you misinterpreted him as well," Arthur said.

"What do you mean?" Kiku asked. The blond grabbed the Asian's hand and pulled him to return him to his seat. "That he told you about Elise so you would learn from his mistake. However, he did not want you to run away. In fact, he also confessed he hated himself for doing the same to Elise," Arthur said.

Kiku eyed him incredulously, and then blinked several times, brushing strands of hair away from his eyes. Arthur knew he was analyzing what he just declared, and remained silent to not interrupt this process. Then Kiku shot a stare to Arthur and said, "You are not lying aren't you?"

"You can read eyes can't you? Am I lying now?" Arthur asked. Kiku did so, searched through the sea of emerald, but saw sincerity in them. However, he became glued to them, and could not tear his eyes away. He always believed Arthur had the power to hypnotize people with his striking eyes.

Unknown to the Asian his cheeks had been flushing pink. "But honest, he really did tell me that. He said that he felt guilty for you leaving the way you did…Oh, and he left just yesterday as well. He is on his way to return to Elise," Arthur continued.

Kiku's lips parted in surprise. "He did?" he exclaimed. Arthur nodded, smiling wholeheartedly. Kiku smiled as well, happy for his old friend. They were silent after that, finally taking in the moment and realizing they hadn't seen each other for years.

Excitement and concern, it was all communicated through their eyes. They had mastered this practice after years of friendship. But Kiku displayed sorrow as well, he still feared for the Briton's life. There was nothing in this world that Arthur desired more to take this burden away from the Japanese's life. "Hey Kiku," Arthur murmured.

"Yes?"

"You know, ever since I got here, I've been aching to kiss you."

Kiku tore his gaze away, placing his hands at his heart. "I know your life Arthur. Everything a Kirkland does gets across all Europe as the news. You are a family man now, we could never be together…"

Arthur was taken back at this. After being uneasily silent, he cupped Kiku's face and brought him closer. "Forgive me Kiku," Arthur whispered, eyes glistening, "please forgive me…"

He let his head fall over Kiku's shoulder and wept there. The Japanese's instincts in turn told him to hold the blond and rub his back soothingly. "While you swore eternal love, all I ever did was get back at you for leaving, when all along your actions were to save me," Arthur said through sharp breaths.

"I don't blame you and I don't resent you for it," Kiku murmured at Arthur's ear. "In fact, I expected it. At least that way you wouldn't look for me. I just wanted to let you know I would fight for my dream through that envelope, but in the end, I still missed you."

Arthur shot his head up and stared at Kiku.

"Then would you still accept me in your life?"

"I do, but yours is taken."

"My life belongs to you."

"What about the child?"

Arthur hesitated, and hated himself for what he had to reply with.

"…He wasn't born with my family name. I will not be betraying him."

"But it's okay to do so to Alice?"

"But I love you."

"I told you, I'm still a bodyguard. If they were able to find out about us, they'll use me to get to you. Are you willing to risk your life like that?"

"My life is meaningless without you."

The Japanese gave up and sighed loudly as a demonstration. But in the end, he couldn't help a smile at finally realizing that Arthur had indeed found him. Feelings of happiness suddenly overwhelmed his core and couldn't help to brush a thumb over the Briton's smiling lips. By then, Arthur's tears had ceased and he too felt a sudden burst of joy. They had found each other and it was just too unbelievable.

They had to prove somehow that they weren't dreaming. Arthur placed an arm across Kiku's neck and the latter brought the blond closer by the tie. They kissed and it was like rediscovering themselves, gently caressing the lips as if it was the first time. One could think they were innocent teenagers by the way they kissed, tenderly feeling the other's soft lips as if to prevent them from breaking. Against their own will, they separated to catch their breaths, panting and sharing smiles.

But passion burned within them, having been locked away for so many years. That kiss was only the beginning of what they did that night. The innocent kisses elevated to fervent ones and the two simply could not help themselves. Kiku let himself slide down as Arthur pressed his body against him, removing the kimono layers like ribbons from a present. The gift inside was the best he had obtained from years, as he cherished Kiku's bare skin with his lips.

Soon enough, the atmosphere had been stirred with heated kisses and daring touches. They could not hold back any longer and so complexions distorted with pleasure at their steady, rhythmic movements, making Kiku's head bump back and forth at the arm of the sofa at every rocking slide of Arthur's hips. In the highpoint of their love making, the two embraced, moaning inaudible nothings to each other. They kissed one last time before Arthur flopped beside Kiku.

There simply wasn't enough space for the two to be side-by-side and enjoy their company, so the blond stood up and held the Asian bridal style and took him to the bed just across the room. As he placed him down, Arthur wrapped his arms around the other and reached out to his ear. "Stay with me tonight won't you?" he whispered. "Forever and always," Kiku responded without falter.

But Arthur's fear did not let him rest peacefully like the Asian did, and battled for sleep.

Nevertheless, sleep did come and morning after it. The curtains had been completely shut, so Arthur did not awake as early as he wanted to by the sun's rays. So when he did begin to stir and realized where he was, his eyelids swung wide open.

He relaxed momentarily as serenity appeased his ultimate fear and felt he had found heaven.

Smiling, gentle eyes were already looking over him.

Arthur Kirkland felt for the first time in his life that he finally belonged.

_The fairy tale ended. The knight had returned to his princess and the kingdom rejoiced. The knight promised eternal love and stayed. The princess gave him her hand and heart in return._

…

_The bodyguard saved the gentleman's life and they finally became one._

_**The End.**_

* * *

><p><strong>See? I'm not such a horrible person with the characters. They <strong>_**sorta **_**had a happy ending!**

**Honestly, I wouldn't call it that either since both have many challenges in their end. Kiku has Yao and his family honor, and Arthur has the responsibility of the marriage he brought upon himself.**

**So I wish them good luck with all my heart even if I wrote this myself! I will leave it there for interpretation. But if you have doubts just ask me.**

**So thank you everyone who just took their time to read this and especially to the constant reviewers!**


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